Feeling Some Kind Of Way About ThisThings have been very tight financially for me. Had to recently borrow money to make ends meet, which I've never done. I saw my oldest brother and his family yesterday and he asked me to take a trip to Florida in less than a couple of months to see my mother to celebrate her 70 something birthday. He went on about how giving mother is and it would be great to celebrate her birthday with her children and grandchildren. I told him I didn't have the money to go. An unyielding financial tightwad, he asked if money for the trip wasn't an issue, would I be willing to go and I told him I'd think about it but I already have things scheduled - my daughter's soccer tournaments and her goal to achieve perfect attendance in school. Something didn't feel right about his "offer" but then it hit me again like a ton of bricks.
He owes me money - about $1900 because the student loan company bundled my mother's PLUS loans together. For years, I was the only one making payments on the loans they refused to unbundle again so I was paying his debt and interest. When I brought this to his and my mother's attention several times over the years, he refused to pay me back and she told me she wished we didn't fight, to "keep peace." At any point, he could have easily paid me back. As the oldest child who's also male, she'd always seems to take my brothers side over mine for as long as I can remember. I'm the youngest and the only female who was constantly told to listen to them growing up. After my father died without a will, I had to hired an attorney to pry my share from my brother's clutched fists. It was a tough decision for me. After the estate payment, he tells me he "included" the student loan payment in the estate check which wasn't something we negotiated at all.
So in order to "keep peace," I let it go not thinking about it anymore until now and it causes me renewed distress. He'd asked me to attend church with him today which I haven't in a very long time. He's a church leader and I'd be too tempted to testify to the congregation,"thank God I'm blessed...now could Big Brother sitting over there pay me back?"