My Dysfunctional Family

SO.... You wanna know about my dysfuctional family? Well, I'm not paying you (Like A therapist) and they do say talking helps. So here is the story of my family life...
I have a would -be 29 year old brother James. I'll explain the would be part later. I was born to a "Christian" family. My father was a church deacon board leader, My mother was head of finances. Sounds like the perfect family, right?

Well, lets be literal. It was perfect. The perfect get-up. I don't recall my father ever touching me in a sexualized manner before the age of 7. But my mother was a full-blown alkie as far back as my memories will allow me. And my the memories I have of my childhood are Crystal F-cking Clear...

On July 13th, 1994 just a fair few days after my Seventh birthday, My daddy told me to go wait in my bedroom. Mom was just leaving out for the evening. Probably off to Ashley's Station. The local pub. I went into my room. Daddy came in a few minutes later, and he had the new family vid-recorder. I asked him what he was doing, and could I have my present, He then stated "Patience Cookie , you know your the only girl for me" (My nickname, was Cookie) then when he started to undress me, IN FRONT of the vid-recorder, I asked him what he was doing. "Don't you trust me?" he asked me in that menacing tone he gets when he is impatient. He started hurting me, and I was crying. I don't wanna go in to full detail, but I think you already know.
It went on for 7 year, without any investigation, even though the police had been called, Child Protcetive Services had been alerted, and many people knew something was wrong. My father had no preference. So log as you were pre-pubescent. My mother knew, but as long as dad gave her drug/liquor money, She let him do whatever he wanted.

My brother, James took so many @$$whoopings trying to defend me. Broken bones, bruises, and, lacerations. All trying to keep me safe.
He ended his life November 2011. I am unsure why. But I am alone now, I have no real family...
deleted deleted
3 Responses Feb 5, 2013

You just keep looking forward- you have been through This much hell and haven't given up...just kno there are sO many people who also are searching for a family! Your past is gone and you are here now, so don't look back the best is yet to come: my childhood gave me Many scars onthe inside, but scars make us stronger. I wish I could promise it will all be easy from here on out, but just love yourself, first, then you will be able to love others...peace to you.

<p>Firstly, you are not alone in this world, well for now perhaps.<br />
Find your new family, they are wonderful, because they are the family that you choose and they choose you.<br />
I hope that your dad has received what was coming to him, and if he hasnt, I hope that you have the strength to follow it thorough, for nothing else than to close that chapter of your amazing life.<br />
Kia Kaha :]</p>

((((GIANT HUG))))