My Mother

In 2008 my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer...she bravery went in and got surgery done. In a matter of weeks she bounced right back to her old self. I was impressed...one of the reasons was she still had a lot of coordination, on the side she had surgery on. A few months later she was able to drive. My mom never got depressed she stayed positive the whole time...what an inspiration.
Let's fast forward to May of this year...all of a sudden my mom started to feel sick all the time, her energy dropped dramatically, she wasn't really eating...both of us thought it was because I was pregnant. She has been known to have the same symptoms as me even cravings. In July her health declined more. Despite me urging her to go doctor she declined over and over. Finally it started to come to a point where she would only get out of bed to go bathroom, eat or smoke. I thought depression was sinking in. So I started to talk to our family doctor as I noticed she was losing weight. So stubborn she just would not get up to go doctor. I prayed an meditated...Please God do something to make her go doctor. As long as she could get out if bed once she refused to go. A few days later an ambulance had to come get her as she was having trouble breathing. After weeks of being in the hospital, having pneumonia, fluid drained from her lungs, extreme weight loss and seeing her 70th birthday I spoke to the doctors and was told not only diabetes but a mass on her chest. It took another week to determine she had cancer. What type we don't know...unfortunately she doesn't want to get the biopsy done. Her body is tired, I see the effects every day...from giving her insulin and medication. I'm trying to make her comfortable. It's just hard to watch someone that was always there for you dying that you love. I am my mothers main care giver as well as her mother's...my 94 year old granny that has skin cancer that's eating her face. My sister who is older helps out very little she is still trying to relive her youth like our father. Is this the time for one to be drinking until drunk and taking drugs? Everyone deals with things differently I know but realistically I'm going to be giving birth in 8-10 weeks to twins so who is going to make sure things get done for her? Between my sister and daddy they can't even give her unprocessed food. How hard is that...I can't always be downstairs when she is eating and their feeding her. Everyone's true colors are coming out. All I can do is what I know is right. I will take care of her for as long as I can without stressing out my unborn babies and myself. From the beginning of this journey I believed that those that were there for me before will continue to be there for me now. I draw strength from myself, my children, my long term boyfriend, a few aunts I have, my niece in law( oh she has been a blessing) and close friends. As far as my other family...sister and daddy included let their conscious be their guide. As I am guided by my intitution it never leads me astray.
Sperious Sperious
31-35, F
4 Responses Oct 15, 2013

Hugs sent

Thank you for your well wishes...it seems like to me she is getting very tired of being in pain. Almost like she is giving up. I guess this happens when one gets tired if taking medicine and getting their sugar checked. Its sad to watch...when you remember the person being full of life, strong willed and independent.

I feel for you. I have just lost my closest friend after a long illness. I know what it is to attend to them and to feel their pain.
I hope you find the strength to face the future. It great that your dear mum has the family around her too.
May you find peace in the midst of this storm.

I'm sorry. I was just about to post my moms story, cancer as well. Just be and do what you can for her, and I'll send light and love.

Thank you very much...love and light to you too