I Have a Father With Cancer
He's gone - my father . At 6:20 this evening, he breathed his last breath and went to the cottage forever.
It's about 1 1/2 hours later and I'm not sure how or what I feel. Very glad that all of his suffering and pain is over. Still working on total acceptance of the idea that he is gone.
I was able to talk about heaven with him. Was he lucid enough to accept it? I like to think so. He grunted a couple of times at one point in response to something I said. Did he make his own peace with his Creator? Again I like to think so. I talked a lot about God not being the same God he thought of. The one that caused so much pain in our family (my grandfather was a victim of the Canadian Native Residential Schools abuses). I talked about heaven being an island surrounded by water and old growth pine - like our island at temagami. I talked about it being time to let go and relax.
After he held his granddaughter's hand one last time - he died, peacfully and calmly without pain.
He was a good Dad, a good man and knew where to get the best fries.