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House Of Clowns

I usually post stories about our youngest here.  But I can't deny our other two sons.  They crack me up too. 

So,  they are teaching economics in the 2nd grade now.  The little man had to "apply" for a classroom job.  He really wanted the position of board eraser.  Along with his application,  he was to turn in two letters of recommendation.  Our neighbor wrote one and his big brother offered to write the other...

To whom it may concern,

I am pleased to write to you my recommendation for one LB (little brother.)  He is an ambitious wunderkind who has caught my attention for his adventurism, steadfast reliability, and unflagging determination.

LB is a dynamic figure,  whose actions often defy explanation or definition.  The common man cannot comprehend him,  because he is uncommon- a rare type of person, if you will.  One often reserved for fantasy and fiction.  To fetter his ambitions with mere prose is an insult that I,  out of fear of speedy reprisal, dare not inflict upon him.

I have seen LB catch salamanders with catlike speed; he has beaten his favorite video games dozens of times, and he has stayed up past midnight.  He can cook a meal of chicken parmigiana for two, and he can eat them both.  LB has survived falls (nay, jumps) of over twenty feet.  He has entered multiple time zones, as well.  When LB was young,  he would put hot sauce on his pacifier(he can distinguish between habanero, jalapeno and poblano.)  And he has done all of these things...before they were cool.

Among all of these diverse exploits, it becomes clear that LB is the ideal candidate for all manner of labors and services.  To LB, a job description is no mere list of required duties; it is a canvas, and LB is an artist...connoisseur...revolutionary.  It is for these reasons I grant LB my utmost confidence, pride and recommendation.

Sincerely,

BB (big brother)

Lilt Lilt 46-50 55 Responses Jan 26, 2010

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I geo cach as well

so thats exactly what big brothers are good for. actually thats one of the best letters of recommendation ive read. he knows him.

I don't know how old big brother is,but he writes one helluva letter..indeed an impressiveCV....did this get him the job??
I once put a bowl of creamed spinach on my head..wasn't cool hen,isn't cool now

I'm sure creamed spinach looked pretty good on you.

I had crew cuts after THAT one,or was it the Play Dough incident where I decorated my heead with the stuff; my parents had oceans of patience which you need to wash,coax and cut PD outtta a kids hair!

I got in a lot of trouble as a kid for cutting my friends hair. I would have loved that job!

I said they were patient...but they were lesss joyful than resigned. Later when we were kids we had iced Tea every (Summer) night..there was usuallyy a "spill"
My dad said,"Somebody doees it every night!" We'd laugh,until he said,"Don't just stand there,get a sponge!"

I have 3 sons and a husband. There is always a spill. Lots of patience.

"Somebody does it EVERY night was kind of a family joke....sometimes I wonder what a sister would have "brought to the table"....

3 More Responses

What a brilliant Big brother! I wonder if I got one like him... Hmmmm....

Hurl, you and Big Brother would make good friends...you both like to use those big words!

Some might call it nepotism.......

Papri, Big Brother just gave Little Brother a lesson on how to mow the lawn.<br />
No resume necessary. That job was inherited. :-)

Thats was so cool reference letter...he would get the best jobs ever :)

Thank you so very much. To the lovely friends who reminded me today, what is the best part of EP. I needed that.

Hooray for Cheapface Ugg pushers!

I won't "like up" their story (don't want to encourage them) but yeah!!

Good point, Woman. I have to say, I enjoyed revisiting it myself :-)

every cloud ... ((hugs))

give the spam a break lilt ... I'd never have found this great story if it hadn't been for them!! lol ... just wonderful ... your boys must be an inspiration to you!

*raises hand like arnold horschak* me too!! me too!!

LMAO...too funny.

Hurldog, the biggest disappointment was the teacher never gave the kids any homework.<br />
As time went on, I realized this was because she didn't want to spend her time grading it.<br />
It was a hard transition for my son this past year, with a teacher who gave LOTS of homework.

That teacher was a disappointment in many ways, Hurldog.<br />
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Glad you stopped by, Nelladell. Our three sons definitely keep us on our toes!

This whole thing is sooo bizarre and unbelievable and wonderful. The incredible letter your boy wrote is -- incredible. Kudos to his parents.

I am deeply disappointed by the lackluster response of the teacher.....maybe she was jealous because SHE never got a letter of recommendation like this........or maybe you should count your blessings that she didn't file a 51A for the hotsauce on the pacifier trick.

Cab, I was so worried about the difference in age. Would they, could they, have some sort of brotherly relationship??? It's actually turning out beautifully.

What a boy! Both of them of course, but I love the vociferous and erudite young man who obviously has a soft-spot for his LB. Great kids, got it from a close relative hmmm?

Knuckleheads, or clowns, you know who I'm talking about, hillbilly :-)<br />
We laugh a lot around here, sometimes to keep from crying.

Oh man I'm glad this rolled up on the recent activity roster. Talk bout startin the day with a grin.<br />
Tell me you got this saved hard copy somewhere so LB can look at it from time to time when he needs to. We all need a letter like this from time to time.<br />
Here it's 'knuckleheads' stead of clowns ... but sounds like the concept's the same. We're never too busy to laugh at ourselves. Kids learn by example, wonky one. Looks like you a helluva demonstrator.

Boby6, I'm glad you enjoyed the letter. He's got his little brother figured out for sure.<br />
"...whose actions often defy explanation or definition." <br />
Ain't that the truth!!!

ahhaahhahaha that was one of the funniest letter i have ever read. It continued to get funny the more you read which makes it even better. Best part is "The common man cannot comprehend him, because he is uncommon- a rare type of person, if you will. One often reserved for fantasy and fiction." I'm definitely gonna be saying that to explain myself for now on, too good.

wonderful.... also I love your puppet avatars

wow he really writes well

I'd hire both the kids. LB for board eraser and BB for my PR :)

You are quite correct, Squigglefish. <br />
Compost!

hehe...LB is full of stunts alright! He's the kind of kid that waits quietly outside the bathroom door, then jumps out, shrieks, and scares you. Everyday :-/<br />
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BB is a psych major, Dex. Go figure.

I would hire LB in an instant as a stuntman, Lilt. And BB has a very bright future in store for him as a copywriter; he could sell anything.<br />
<br />
Some of the teachers described in the comments seem like incompetent haridans! Talk about "old school"!

Lauren and Sahira, I know you get what I'm talking about. I'm really proud of my little guy, for it was him that made all the adjustments this school year. She did not budge on a damned thing. We know that May 21 will arrive and then we will be on our way.

Grunt, she drives a Jaguar. <br />
I rest my case.

Ah, Masase, what a lovely comment. Thank you. Do you have children?<br />
The little man has learned A LOT this school year, and I'm not just talking fractions.

I don't know what impressed me most: The "English" sense of humor of BB, or the extremely well written letter. Just out of curiosity, how old is BB? He could really really write for a living.<br />
I'm very tempted to congratulate your kids. <br />
However, wunderkinds sprout when they have wundermothers.<br />
Congratulations, wundermother!<br />
Oh, and don't worry about the teacher. They are starting to learn that there is frustration on earth... al lot of frustration. But it doesn'n mind as long as they have a loving mother as you surely are.

It is awesome. Big brother is 21 and he has a twin too.<br />
We like to space our kids 13 years apart :-O

haaha awesum! how old is the kid hoo wrote it?

Don't you worry, unobserver, he got the job.!

Quite an astounding reference, although I must admit, it does little to tout his erasing skills. :-) You are lucky to have such smart, sweet boys.

She likes kids. She just doesn't really like boys. That may sound strange, but I've seen it before. <br />
<br />
This story is not about bad teachers. I know that there are some out there. But in my experience, raising kids for 21years, and being a teacher myself, 99% of them are fantastic. They have one of the most important jobs in the world, and treat the job as such.

see thats the problem she is a mediocore teacher at best- no i don't think you should switch classrooms in this case but there are definate cases where children should be or the teacher fired because they don't have any business teaching kids, don't even like kids

I think you should run for governor, Faucon. You have a lot of experience working with animals. My son could write your speeches!

I'm not trying to say she is a bad teacher. She just was not a good "match" for him. I don't believe in switching classroom teachers, life doesn't work that way. You can't choose your boss, co-workers, neighbors, etc. I'm sure the teacher has a sense of humor, it's just not us :-/

I thought your older son did a nice job writing that letter for his little brother. I guess that teacher has no sense of humor. Oh Well, Take Care.

I thought your older son did a nice job writing that letter for his little brother. I guess that teacher has no sense of humor. Oh Well, Take Care.

i think the assignment would be better done in 6th or 7th grade as they will be getting jobs in a couple of years and need those skills as it stands he won't remember this when he needs the infromation plus this child is in the second grade who is he going to use for references many kids live in single parent homes, some in group homes or foster homes and may not be able to get 2 and unlike in junior high they don't have multiple teachers <br />
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What pissed me off about the assignment is that the teacher expected someone else to take on homework in this form and i got penalized because my mother wanted to have a ***** day of course i didn't tell my teacher anything about this and most kids won't they just don't do things and then get labled a bad student (my mother was usually somewhat helpful with homework but not this) <br />
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and it spills over into the adult world too there was a job i didn't apply for, printed out the ap and everything but threw it away when i saw they wanted references to write letters to them and your consideration was dependent on them reciveing said letters <br />
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ok we'll put aside i wasn't sure where one of them was at the time- i do now one of them is an office manager the other a job placement worker and the final one a persinal reference that dosn't own a computer to type such a thing and cannot afford to go to a library to do it for me because these people cannot use a telephone <br />
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it is one thing to ask/ expect the applicant to jump through hoops its another to inconvience other people in such a way

I have issues with this part of her curriculum as well, Tulick. They get "paid" $5 fake dollars on Fridays for their jobs. They give $1 back for taxes and pay $1 for "rent" of their desks. If they were given any citations during the week, they pay those too. If she thinks the class is acting up, she fines them. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr.<br />
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I'm am truly sorry your Mom wasn't there for you. I see such extremes in the schools. Parents who don't support education, then those who actually do all their kids work.

what disterbs me is they are trying to get kids to apply for jobs in the 2nd grade i mean i'm all for teaching those skills but thats too early <br />
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and expecting leetters of reference; thats making parents and others do homework not the kids i rembember a class assigment where your parent(s) had to decribe you or something or other <br />
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my mother loooked at it like it was filled with dog poop porceeded to tell me she didn't know me, knew nothing about me and therefore couldn't do it <br />
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Finally i cajoled her into writing something and got half crdit for turning it in late because of that BS god i was pissed <br />
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TEACHERS STOP GIVING PARENTS HOMEWORK!!!!!!

Thank you, Jo. As a Mom, I will cherish this letter forever. He's a lucky little man, his big brothers are wonderful role models for him. Even if they put hot sauce on his "Bop-a-Dee."<br />
<br />
BB #1 is a great writer and poet. He is almost finished with his undergrad., then off to medical school to study psychiatry. We are very proud...and crazy. Maybe he'll figure us out :-)

Awesome letter!!! Big brother obviously takes great pride in his LB! And his writing skills are superb!<br />
He should consider a career in politics!!!!

Destry, the one I have a conference with at 3:15 today !!! He's not in trouble, just the regular update kind. Still.<br />
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Yes, BB is a very good writer.

I have taught many kids myself and always had good rapport with the other teachers. This one, I just don't get. Just four more months and we'll be on our way.<br />
<br />
What that letter does not say...it was the two big brothers who convinced him to try the hot sauce on his pacifier!

Lilt, that teacher is an *******...sorry but as an ex-teacher I am sooo impressed....the letter is so well written, hilarious and quite moving...I actually had tears reading it...there is so much love there!<br />
You have incredible sons....no doubt, in part, to you and Mr. Lilt.

It's been a long year.

Ahaha oh I loved that!

Pumpkin, unfortunately she did not appreciate the letter. I don't believe she has a sense of humor.

*like* the comment.
*love* the recommendation.
*dislike* the teacher.

I'd hire him! Obviously a good family man.