My Mother Doesn't Love Me, She Just Loves What I Can Do For Her

when i was little i remember my mother being a good mom. nice and sweet. but as i got older she changed. she no longer saw me as her daughter but her competition.

she never wanted me to succeed in anything. she would tell me not to go to college because i would never finish. she couldn't stand to see me have money because she would quickly ask for it. she would either ask for me to lend her a LARGE amount of money which was more than i even had. but since she wasn't aware of how much i had she asked for the most she thought i had. other times she would act very nice to me out of no where (only when she knew i had money saved up) and offer to hold my money for me and keep it save. i admit i fell for this trick in more than one occassion. she never gave me back the money. she kept it for herself.

she sabotage any chance i ever had to get a job with people she or my father knew. she would convince them not to give me the job in one way or another, and she would end up convincing them to give the job to somebody else.

now i'm working as a ******** and she knows it. at first she mocked me and made fun of me. now she is nice to me. doesn't kick me out of her house anymore. but again she wants to "hold" my money and "keep it save" i said no way!!!!! she's been throwing hints at me to buy her a coop, (in the club that i work in i don't make that much money) but she assumes i do even after i explained to her that i don't. she keeps asking for gifts in a nondirect way. yesterday she told me she wanted a coach bag for her birthday. (in a nondirect way) and in a nondirect way i told her "that's for rich people! that can afford a 500 dollar purse. we aren't rich we dress with what we can afford." (which is still nice :) i said this in a stern tone of voice to make it clear to her that i was not gonna buy her such an expensive gift for her birthday when she wonte even wish me a happy birthday on my bday. smh she has some nerve. she never cease to amaze me. she is sooooooo greedy and materialistic, and cocky. ugh my mother is a true narcissist. she wonte even say happy birthday to me yet she goes all out for her bday. smh. i always get her a gift on her bday but only what i can afford. what hurts me the most is not that she doesn't find my birthay a day to celebrate but that she doesn't even care that i'm a ******** as long as i have money to get her things smh.
veronica4ever veronica4ever
26-30, F
9 Responses Aug 8, 2011

I can relate to your story. My mother is the same way. She never wants my sister and I to successed in anything. She always gets things handed to her. Then us kids would always have to suffer. I feel that my siblings and I, where only born to be a meal ticket for her somtimes. People would feel sad for us kids, so they would bail her out. She has 5 kids now. Finally got her tubes tide after my little sister was born. Growing up with her, us kids always feared that the electric would be shut off, water, heat, air conditioning etc. We always had to take care of each other. She would dissapear for 2 weeks with her mysterious boyfriends she had. One time a family friend stopped by the house and saw my little brother at the time who was about 6yrs old. Was putting sugar on bread just to give it some flavor, because we had no food. We had Cps come to our house and ask us questions. My mother told us to lie or they would take us away and split us up. We always moved all the time. Never stayed in a home for more then 2 yrs. Ive always kept my clothes in boxes or trash bag. It would always be a matter of time before we moved. Ive been to 3 different high schools and 4 elemantary schools. I could go on and on about my life. I could right a book about it.To this day she is still the same way. If I have any money she wants it. Now I'm a mother of twins. I had them at 18yrs old. Im 25 now. I was blessed with a boy & girl. My mother always had a support group helping her out. Her mom (my grandma) has handed her a car, bought her a house, and my mom also gets rent pretty much for free. I love my mom because shes my mom. Even though she has put me and my siblings through pretty much hell. I will always still love her. She has shown me what kind of parent not to be. Im still strongling as a parent myself since my kids father (aka ***** donor) is a drug addict and is in and out of jail, doesnt help me with child support. I still try my best to hold my head high, and to keep striving for my goals in life. Which is to not give my kids the life I had growing up. Moving all the time, changing schools, worring if there going to eat that day etc. All I can do is be a better mother then my mom was to me. My life could of been a lot worse.If anyone else has gone through this. All I can say is keep your head held high, stay positive and keep trying to reach your goals. Dont let anyone stand in your way. Dont EVER give up. Keep on fighting.

My mom is the SAME exact way. I hate it.

My mother is not as cruel but she has a lot of hang ups when it deals with female relationships of any kind. Even though my mom treated my younger brother with first class treatment and treated me as if I were some messed up child that did everything wrong. I decided that one day, when I have children doesn't matter if its a boy or girl. I will love them for who they are no matter what the circumstance. I think my mom forgets a majority of the time is that I am human. I have feelings just like everyone else. but what makes me different from my mother is that I am choosing to break that cycle that she put me through from the day I was born. Just remember, you have the power to change "your life" and make it the way you want it too.

meds for what? is your mom a narcississt too?

yea, you are absolutely right. at times i think my mother is a sociopath. she is sooooo cold hearted. i don't understand how she could be so cruel with her own child

I think narcissistic is an understatement!!!!! I'd add selfish and cold as well.......At least my mom remembers my b-day......My mom is manipulative, and a drama queen....Everything has to be about her.......She has to be the center of attention.......She's gotten better since she's been on meds though......:)

in my opinion they choose to be that way. they'll change once they have a life changing experience that forces them to reconsider there views on life. hopefully! if not then god is going to continue to make them go through similar bad experiences untill they learn their lesson.

thnx for your input, but i disagree with you. being money hungry is a ugly personality trait that ive seen in both men and women. my brother and uncle are big money hungry conartists. more so than my mother.

alot of mothers are like that its genetic in females

There is nothing genetic about females being cold, selfish b****es......Those are learned behaviors and can be changed......I am not that way and would prefer to not be included in your generalization of females as a whole......