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Resolution

Let me tell you one sad/happy story about 2013 New years eve party. I was at some big club with my friends and we had great time until one guy told me: Hi, I like fat girls just like you are... and I was looking at him thinking WTF?! and i wanted to slap him but my friend pulled me away. I was so angry and sad I can't describe to you. I ran to the ladies rom and I burst into tears. When I looked up I saw myself in the mirror and I was wondering: "why the hell am I crying here because some stupid words from a guy who doesn't even know me and is simply unimportant in my life?!" and then I decided I won't put myself down because someones words ever again. I won't let people make me sad because their opinion or thoughts about me. I have best quote for that: It doesn't matter how you look, what your weight is or how much makeup you put on. The right people will love you for what's on the inside... There is many quotes similar to this one but you get the point. I will be who I am and if people want me in their lifes they will love me for who I am. And after thinking about all that I went dancing next to that stupid guy and I danced so sexy he was dying for me.

I hope you all made some good decisions for 2013.
I hope 2013. will be the best year in your life
You deserve being happy, don't forget that
oh and one other thing: Don't ever stop dreaming and believing!
<3
thepianogirl thepianogirl 18-21, F 176 Responses Jan 1, 2013

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I wonder what that guy got by being randomly ill mannered towards a complete stranger. It's not like he could expect to get the satisfaction of seeing if it upset you because most people would go off somewhere private to fall apart. I'm very glad you got back on the dancefloor. Good for you. I also doubt that guy has a lot of luck with the ladies.

Awesome inspiration btw ur wolf dp is freaking awesome

Love your sharing

What a bitter/sweet story!
Empty vessels make the most noise! The world is full of ignorance, I'm glad you could release yourself from hurtful words, a smart thing.
I like your way of expressing your solution, and am sure I'll use this idea when my kids hit similar problems.

Beauty may only be skin deep, but ugly like his guy goes all the way through.

well done you are what you are, if they don't like it go some where else, some people need to look in the miror them selves beauty is only skin deep, beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, we all ave our own characters whats his.

RAWK!!!

Anyone so asinine to ever make such a comment to another person suffers severe issues. Pity them, live your life happily with a smile, always knowing you do not suffer from their problems.

dear pl take it easy...there r so many ppl who dont think b4 comment..u may not care 4 them..life s precious..enjoy every moment..

HE called YOU a fat girl? Oh god, what a lying *******!

he is a classic manboy.

What was the reason for him to say such comment? maybe it was his insecurity.. His way of getting your attention was to try a make you feel a reaction, a reaction of love or attraction is too difficult to obtain from you at that moment, and he probably felt he was going to get rejected anyways, so he went the easy route, to offend you, thus in his mind making you pay for what he expected from you anyways.. a rejection.. He probably really felt you were too beautiful for a guy such as himself that he didn't even bother on trying to meet you, but just wend directly to offend you.

Some people are just ugly on both inside and out. I remember seeing a tee shirt one time that says it all.......................I might be fat but you are ugly I can loose weight!

Hey Piano Girl!

here's a HUG! Unfortunately dumbshitz are everywhere and there just is no escaping them. Be strong! and as you noted, it's what's inside that counts.

You know that guy is so wrong about you and the only way you are that is phat not fat.

So first question is are you fat? Are the pictures I see up here major photoshops or some fantasy girl?

And if you are fat, why burst into tears? Here is a guy saying "I like you fat."

I would make a resolution to see the positive inside every statement, rather than to negate what someone said.

Think of that idiot as a gift. He made you realize your power. He was a strength challenge. That's what all a**holes are. You just keep on being your rock star self!! That's always the best revenge;)

And I probably would have hit him FOR you

Oh wow...now I understand.Now I understand the Insanity training story . Ok that *** was trying to give you a head case. I have heard of it, to insult someone to shock them; its supposed to get you past any defences . Look up Mystery man on YouTube. He was just...horribly bad...and stupid...god I would never disrespect anyone like that.

nice.. :)

I admire your attitude. Keep it up. You are an inspiration to others - you are to me:) thank you for sharing your story!

I don't think we can ever really know why people do things. Probably the guy was dissatisfied with himself for some reason and ended up lashing out at you. But he had his reasons (however incomprehensible they may seem) to feel that way and say what he said. Maybe they were good reasons, maybe they were bad. I highly doubt that he felt any satisfaction after saying that.
I think what I'm trying to say is to just not take it personally. The opinion of somebody like that can't be trusted.

I cry for you just reading it. When I was young, I was plump and on the short side. Only you could know how much thoughtless comments can hurt. I am now in my 50's, yet regardless of how i look, I always struggle with my self image. I struggled with bulimia in college, took 4 years to conquer it. You try to brush off comments, but they always hurt. I try to look at the inner beauty, and the older I get the more I see that first, and the physical person second. I swear that I have worked with ladies that were physically knock outs, but because of their nasty thougths and deeds, never considered them beautiful at all. The same goes for race, I am absolutely color blind. I take people one at a time, and evaluate them on how they act and how they treat me. Love yourself!!

I'm confused. Some jackass said you were fat? If that should ever happen again, (which for the life of me I can not imagine it happining in the first place) just laugh at him as hard as you can and then walk away still laughing. You are beautyfull. That's all I can say without sounding like an old pervert. Don't ever think your not.

hi beautiful pianogirl & thankx for your story ~ youre so right (so stay resolved)
that guy was a jerk. its just a typical & very meaningless insult, becuz chances are ppl (esp. women)will be upset by being called fat (even when its obvious theyre not) so its an insult that can be used when u know nothing about a person
Happy newyear (2013 will be a better year for you than for ppl like that who need to validate themselves by putting others down)

You were sure beautiful playing the piano in the video. Beautiful people do beautiful things. Always keep your chin up....because you are a lady! BTW, I have appreciated the gifts you have sent me, ex-jetengineer (site shut down by ep)..........A.

U GO GIRL! May 2013 be your best year! In the words of a beautiful woman I RESPECT...don't stop dreaming and believing...so Love Live and Laugh.

My wife and I grew up in the same village in the 1960's to 1980's.

We were thin witha fast metabolism.Now we are in our 50's and were both 30 over weight.

Were we happier when we were thin ?? Actually the answer was no for both of us.We try to walk and look after our bodies but we are happier being large.

You also need to know that 35 million woman can't find a mate.40 % of these 35 million are thin and great looking.But people pick mates on more than weight and looks.

Obviously that guy doesn't get laid very often with those pick up lines. You should have laughed in his face and said "I'm well outta your leage"

So, you're either not the girl in your profile picture, or the guy who talked to you is a jerk. If you are the girl in the profile picture, then put a smile on your face, because you've just proven to yourself that you're a wonderful person.

Way to go girl!!! Beauty is not about size or numbers on the scale,its about a good heart, confidence and kindness. Keep shining...happy 2013

u should have told him that you dont like stupid guys.

you're not even little fat , you have a gorgeous body , that man was just trying to make you upset but in the end you stand up like a strong woman and showed him that you don't care and that all he said is bullshit and nothing .that's so inspiring , you rock !!!

Are you guys nuts. Does this girl look curvaceous? Its like when girls call an obviously very pretty girl ugly. it makes them feel better about themselves. This girl is actually very thin, which is very sexy.

first off. theres nothing wrong with being over weight. its only wrong if you see being over weight a problem. secondly.. your far from fat. not even close. dude choose the wrong lines cuz most likely he cant talk to female eithers. with how everyone lives in this time of age, 70%(made up) of the population doesnt know how to speak to the opposite sex. If it were me, i wouldnt of said anything to you cuz i have no coinfidence. doesnt mean your not the most beautiful girl in the room. i have found that if you hear something that offends you that is directed to you, snap back with a lil sarcasm, even if your not good at it, it helps. dude either leaves or hook line sinker you got him with ur attitude. now you are a very talented individual, beautiful, ect.. but the real fun starts when you just dont give a **** about anyone else or what they say. it works

Good for u! He's an idiot with no respect for women

You look damn sexy to me. Maybe he was drunk or more likely, maybe he was just a ***** ;)

wow some Guy found you attractive and actually told you. are you insane? do you really have guys wanting you in general or do all the ones YOU like think your too fat. maybe that look in the mirror should have been a reality check. get out of denial and appreciate verbal outgoing men. u shudda danced WITH him gratefully. your egos fat too btw

I think that is rude to say people fats. I think some men should watch out their mouths. I don't think that kind of men are good for partnership or to be friendly.

First of all, i do feel a little awkward commenting on your story seeing as i never, ever have contact with you (it's because i'm too shy), but i saw your response to that rather unforgiving comment you got on my page (which i am also sorry you had to read that- the nerve of some people!) &amp; i found it a little hard to ignore.
I also want to reassure you that i am completely on your side, whatever this man's intentions were (&amp; i am not the only one, of course). He may just have been nervous &amp; his words came out wrong, or maybe he really was trying to offend you. But whatever he meant, please try to forgive him :)
Judging by this story, your ego is nowhere near fat, &amp; to add on to it, i have never seen any 'proof' that it is anyway- you seem like a very lovely person from the bits &amp; bobs i have seen!
Also, generally speaking it is much harder than it seems to identify if someone is underweight, a healthy weight, or overweight because we humans come in so many shapes &amp; sizes, &amp; it just gets confusing! But this fact aside, i would be rather surprised if you were overweight- &amp; that's merely the truth. Not that it should matter what i, or anyone else thinks of you :)
Goodness, i really, really hope that rude comment didn't make you cry, shake, or make your heart go everywhere! I am so sorry you had to read it, i truly am...
By the way, you can delete her comment, i think? But it's just a suggestion :)
No matter how far or close this may be, one day you surely will be so confident in yourself that you will not be hurt by such things. But for now, keep your chin up!
Whatever he really meant, i completely empathize with your emotional reaction, &amp; i truly am happy to hear that you were able to pick yourself up after that, be proud! But i also hope that if he meant well, he wasn't hurt either (but please don't feel guilty over the possibility that he was! I am on your side more than anything!)
Oh, &amp; obviously it is always your decision (as it is your life!), but don't feel guilty about not giving yourself up to any guy who seems to have some interest in you- you're not a fudging carpet, you know! But it's okay to be flattered by someone elses' appreciation of you how you look ;)! Just try to make sure that you don't actually care- that would be a whole new level, &amp; it would mean you would become dependent on others' opinions of you to be content with yourself.
Well, i hope that made sense, &amp; i hope i put everything i wanted to in there! &lt;3

Do u lik me

He was a jerk. I am glad you came to the realization that you are in control of your happiness and not the jerk. Kudos to you!!!

Your brilliant just how you are girlfriend.love you xxxx

Most guys are terrible with words, when it comes to meeting for the first time.

He might of ment he likes bigger girls and tried to make a joke of it and Failed!! When I was fat I had a pal who always said I wasnt fat enough for him cause he liked big big girls...It was his way of saying Im not that fat I guess He is a nice guy trying to be funny,,,NOT hahahaha

now that is a way better way of saying it, if you can take a joke that is. Maybe if the guy in this girls story said something on the nicer side of the topic, maybe she might have got on with him.

Wait a minute!! thepianogirl.. Why did you get offended by something that your obviously not!

Hello babe

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Those are good resolutions. I would say the most important, especially based on your story, is to accept and love yourself the way you are. Loving yourself healthily is the most important outlook you can have in life. Not to be narcissistic about it, just have a healthy love for yourself, how you look, your weight, your approach to life, etc. The parts that you don't like go and change or change the way you feel.
Looking at your pictures and seeing your response initially is telling of some issues ... and I hope you stand strong and be honest with yourself.
On a similar note, I've known a few ladies with eating disorders because they had an unhealthy outlook on themselves...no matter how skinny they were they still saw themselves as fat.
Again, love yourself, be honest with yourself and you'll be able to love others:)

I am agree

We all have the power to be happy or to suffer. You decided to be proud and happy at that moment and that is what life is all about. Feeling proud of who you are. There is in deed a beautiful person inside each one of us, we just need to acknowledge that to make it true. Thanks for sharing your story. God bless you.

It is all about choices isnt it...Choose to life or die to be happy or sad YES we can choose for ourselfs what kind of day we will have.lol

Wow! some guys are complete ******** and deserve to get punched in the face. But good for you! I'm proud that you made the right choice and decided to be happy with yourself.

I agree with Seeker! The only reason they said that was to elicite a responce. This tactic is used to make women seek validation, sometimes this means sexual validation. He basically said I like you please seek reassurance from me. It is a crap way to try to start a conversation. You seem to have responded that best way possible.

He called you fat? Perhaps he had too much to drink. You are gorgeous and perfect! Stay out of clubs. And avoid immature men. (Usually, your peer group.) Go older.

Actually...
It was a move made because he liked you and found you attractive. It's called a "neg," a negative comment that is said in order to make an attractive woman feel insecure, like the rest of the world. For the opening line, a man says something that is designed to catch a woman off guard, to take her down from her pedestal. That way, instead of being tongue tied in the presence of an attractive woman, as is usually the case, he shows her that her being attractive is no big deal. It's reverse psychology. It works. Unfortunately, in your case,
perhaps because you're young, that wasn't the case. I saw your photo. It's obvious you're not fat. That's why he said it. Not to hurt you but to get a conversation going with you. I'm not defending the comment he made. I'm merely stating what it was, a neg. And before you think men are crazy and cruel for having to deploy this tactic, consider how complicated and incredibly difficult it is to approach an attractive woman. Women have it easy. They don't have to do anything except sit back and receive attention. Men have to do all the work. They have to get the courage to go up and try to stand out, to get a woman's attention, or else be ignored and go home alone. It's hard, believe me. So hence, the creation of the neg. Whether it's peacocks having to extend their feathers as far as possible or birds singing or hours, a male must go through lengths to pursue a female. Now you know the truth. You're an attractive young woman, he liked you, he used a neg, he failed, you were hurt and confused. Blame it on nature. Life is pretty strange, huh?

There are some cruel,wicked people around,you are right to pay no heed to stupid insults."Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me",and of course you are correct,the beauty within is what most people are attracted to.

Trust me ive been in the same situation... while strangers try to make me feel terrible with their harsh comments my frnds love me fr who i am... and me i learnt pleasing others is nt wt i was born fr... rather its turned me positive and nw i carry on with who i am.. life is such fun when u stop worrying and start living... cheers to u:-) <3

:) Happy New Year!

you should have kicked him.... anyways happy new year!!!!!!!!!!

Hey girl dont get upset about this, this guy likes large ladies his delivery was out of order. My wife is a very happy large women (we met at Match com) to me she is the sexiest thing in the World, we love each other and have great sex life.
Before we got married she had many insecurities about her weight, that led her to have a very active sex life with many man for most of her life till we got married.
Now she thinks i am the best thing since slice bread, we been married for 9 years i am 55 and she is 51, go out enjoy your life. (I am her first husband, she is my second wife)
ps. I am not all that bad :) they tell me I am a handsome man with a very good life style and financially secured, I guess you could say she did very well, and so did I.
Go out and play smile lough and have a blast, life is short.

Just a thought. Maybe fat isn't an insult to him, didn't he say that he liked.... I have weighed upto 383 lbs at one time and can understand how it could feel. Haven't you seen guys drunk and dumb enough that it just may have been a come on?

You are fat to him, so what? you are who you believe you are.
next time someone says something you consider mean to you, give them a sweet smile ans say I know me and I love me.

I am glad you found the strength to ignore and even tease himxxx

you are beautiful and sweet

You look great screw that guy

maybe it was just a bad pickup line....

You don't look fat in your picture, screw him man if anything fat dudes are out lol

There is no way anyone would consider you fat so whatever the idiot was saying I am sure he was not talking about your size. Is it possible he has a lousy way of saying you are P.H.A.T.? If that is what he was saying I would have to agree... You are pretty, hot and tempting! Have a great new year and keep that positive attitude close.

I love what you say here, and agree 100%.
First, he is an idiot to even think of another human in terms of fat/skinny.
Second, even in those terms, he lied. Big fat lie. I looked at your pictures, and you are smoking hot and incredibly beautiful. The dude knew you were way above him and was trying to bring you down to his level - which is an incredibly selfish and jerky way to think of and treat anyone, let alone a goddess like you.
He'll never be so lucky as to dance with someone like you.

You have sent a Happy New Year to all through your story. I wish you a very Happy and peaceful year of 2013

If someone had told me that, I would've said," **** you, I'd like to see you fit into these jeans or this dress (or whatever you were wearing)." And walk away flipping the bird. Although I'm glad you took it like a good sport, I just don't take bullish*t from people :P

well if that is you in your picture, ur far from fat. Maybe he was being sarcastic as in you are thin, but he tried a tactic that men use today to pickup women. They tell u something to make you feel bad if they think you are hot and worth picking up. A hot girl gets a reality check with what he says, gets frustrated and intrigued to please the guy internally wondering, "why did this guy diss me? what is his problem? yet he is talking to me." Yes! these guys are being trained. It supposed to work a high percentage of the time, but if you had stuck around had he not offended you, maybe you could have found out his motive for saying what he did. Either way, it's over. Don't let it affect you ever again.

You're on the right track...good thinking!

Well said ! Don't care about what people think live your life and enjoy it ! Thanks for sharing your story :)

Great story. Interesting read and enjoyed it.

This story is great! Really helpfull it was, thank you for sharing!
Some people seem to enjoy to bring others down, don't know why, and maybe I don't want to know.

that guy insecure blind stupid idiot,you sexy

Very nice self-care....you ended up thinking about what was said, seeing it as empty, and then enjoying yourself! You also realized that you hold the truth and know yourself better than anyone else! Thank you for sharing this, and please continue to enjoy yourself as you truly are!

Thank you for that story. NEVER let someone you don't even know, affect your life. Like they are that important! Good on you for getting out their and having a good time!! You go girl!

Just a Kid.. learn to ignore and not attach too much significance to what people comment..

HAPPY NEW YEAR..

The guy was obviously an insecure blind stupid idiot. You are a beautiful girl inside and out and you have the right idea. Love yourself for who you are, make improvements that please you and nobody else. The people that love you will always love you no matter how you appear to the rest of the world. Take care and stay strong!

You look incredibly beautiful from your profile pic. Of coarse thats all I can see but still. Don't go deleting you cupcake love group because of that ***:)

best resolution i have heard in a long time

He's an @ss. Good that you got out there and danced. He is a loser, YOU are awesome!! Happy 2013! love, Sunny

Why give attention to the words of the people?When they say something introduced from the right ear and narrated from the right ear
I'd like you always influenced by the words of the people, but now do not give attention to any one just because I'm trying to realize happiness for myself

I don't know what this guy was talking about, unless he meant "Phat grrl", which you are. Weight is not your problem.

I've thought about this a bit, with your requests for nutritionists and trainers and the development in your trapezes and all.

Have you ever considered going through an Outward Bound course? I think you would love it. It takes a lot of courage to perform before an orchestra in the way you do and this is the resource that anchors you most of all. Outward Bound can ***** away a lot of baby fat, both physically and emotionally, that you are ready to lose, this sensitivity about your weight being one thing. They have programs in the wilderness and on the water and you are ready for exactly this kind of challenge. And, once you do it, you never have to do it again.

You owe it to yourself.

I am glad I read this story this morning. You have an awesome attitude, and I wish you the best in 2013 and beyond!!!

That guy is stupid you're amazing. :)

He was purposefully being cruel. Whatever his attraction to you, whether he was or wasn't~ it was rude and cruel to do what he did and completely unnecessary. So ask yourself this, do you think he would be a nice person to be with? Do you think someone like that would be patient and kind to future children? What matters Is what is on the inside, the outside is part of that whole part, but people get so caught up in dating what they have learned is attractive from looking at magazines or watching the tv which tells us this is what we should be attracted to which in a lot of cases is not correlating with happy relationships. What is attractive? That is a very personal question and differs from person to person, no one can say definitely that someone is or isn't attractive to anyone else, no one can make that call. When you're with the right person they will be attractive regardless because when you look at them, you will not just see ob<x>jectified sexualified body parts (like the media often encourages) but you will see them as a whole person, their self will beam out at you. You will want someone who can see you as a whole person too in order to enter into a happy relationship and raise happy children. Having your own sense of self and self confidence that cannot be destroyed by anyones mere fancy is important to becoming a strong woman. and so you will now be a better person than you were.

Well let me say that you certainly do not look fat in your photograph but, in general, there is far too much political correctness surrounding this subject. The male is initially attracted to a slim fit beautiful woman, if you are not that and it is due to your own self indulgence, then you will have made yourself unattractive to most males. There are still some males normally the B models who will grab anything that comes. Its no good beating about what is on the inside, and its not fair. Its nature and because of it not many males will get close enough to see a good personality, so you will have reduced your opportunities from the offset

You sure don't look fat in your photos,you are gorgeous.That guy needs glasses,or a white stick.

Reading your story have inspired me to keep reminding myself that beauty is skin deep and that is one of my resolutions for the year cause even though I'm not skinny and pretty like the b****** in the magazine, I'm beautiful on the inside.

even though you are very very very far from being fat you made a great choice. The guy will always be a looser and you my sweet friend are beautiful inside and out

You obviously deserve better anyway. good luck, but I dont think you'll need it.

I usually go with the 'I know you are but what am I?" response. Being mature is the most important thing here.

Don't be shy cause of others view of you.
Care just if you wanna change yourself and do it.
If you are happy, fat or slim, tall or short ,ugly or beauty...
don't let anyone brake it up.
You are yourself and your choices.
You are the only judge of your self.
Don't be hard on your self.
For every one who hates you
a billion that loves you!!!

I am disappointed you cared about what he thought.