What's With Indian Mother In Laws And Wedding Dresses?

My Indian mother in law looked like she was gonna cry if she didn't get an opportunity to pick out my wedding dress. She said that it was her birthright. I find it strange that she would feel so strongly about this outdated indian tradition after being immersed for decades in North America culture. I wonder if there was a deeper reason? Like she wanted to feel like a bride herself? I never did find out. But I know every Indian mother in law insists on this practice so there has got to be a strong passionate reason for this behaviour...
An Ep User An EP User
3 Responses Jan 20, 2013


Don't let her. I let my mil choose everything, where we got married the town in which she lived, who was invited to the wedding, my clothes everything. 10 years in I feel like I was a guest at my own wedding. I did it to please her and as I felt I had no say my parents and his went halves on the cost. I forgot that it was my day. I would be getting married only once. She made the day all about her. Didn't even invite my family to her house for a cup of tea. My whole family came from India to nz for the wedding and felt like they were shunned. Mil even kept all the wedding money and gifts we received as repayment of her costs. Please set clear boundaries with your mil now and don't do what I did. If my marriage lasts I will renew my vows.

I know what you mean, I think they just like to relive their memories or experience something that they did not get to experience (as they were too poor or did not have the wedding they wanted). They are jobless and therefore take an obsessive interest in their kids' life. Of course, sons aren't that interesting hence they just go crazy when they have a daughter-in-law. It isn't her birth right! In the patriarchal society, these women do not get to exercise their opinions in most things in life, hence they just go overboard with the only person who is nice to them.