Speeding Towards Finality

Theres just no escape is there.  It would be so much easier if I were a religious man but unfortuatly I am not.  I believe that once I die I am nothing more than food for the insects, a virtual buffett if I dont lose this extra weight! Seriously though when I actually begin to contemplate death it really haunts me.  I cannot comprehend nothingness and I know once I am dead it wont matter but god dammit I'm selfish.  I dont want to leave.  Despite everything I hate and any whining I do on here I happen to enjoy life.  I dont hate everything all the time.  I'm having a good time I dont want to leave the party.  I like most people am probably most scared of what I will miss out on. If I could live forever I most certainly would, this death thing sucks.  It doesn't seem fair.  I only hope we can figure out a way to beat it before it catches up to me. 
johnwad3 johnwad3
26-30, M
15 Responses Dec 15, 2006

Somewhere I read "If you have a hard time finding faith, behave as you had faith and practice Christian values" Pray even tho your not sure someone's out there listening.Your first prayer should be "Help my unbelief." Over time you'll find it in your heart. After all, it's all a matter of what's in your heart whether you believe or don't believe. They'll never be any absolute proof. That's why it's called faith and not fact.
The Bible says "Faith is the evidence of things unseen and all things hoped for."

Maybe there is something underlying these fears that have nothing to do with death. Let's assume that your fear of death is a symptom of something under the surface that your conscious mind is unaware of. Perhaps the problem was in your upbringing that cause great insecurities. Did your father or mother die when you when you were young.
It may have something to do with your relationship with your father and mother , as well as their relationship with each other which you aren't aware of. This is where counselling comes in handy.
That's how it was in my case and I would never know that if I had not had psychotherapy

Here is an interesting thought.Let's assume that your fears are correct. There is no afterlife as we know it. However, if scientist are correct in here thoughts about our Universe, there is no end. Because matter and energy can neither be created or destroyed but it can be and is interchangeable. That being the case everything is garenteed to be repeatable in any number of ways. You will be born again, literally. The day you die in x number of years you'll be born again ad infinitive. You won't know time passes because you'll be dead until then.

Go to YOU TUBE and type in Near Death Experiences (NDE). Check it out extensively. It may help you to rethink your thoughts.Give a comprehensive look at the Mystery of the Shroud of Turin.
I went through a period like that when I was in my thirties.

There is only one way for like minded people to face death with peace of mind. I believe part of my fear is fearing what I will regret or miss out on in life, not being able to change the misakes I made. After all, we only live for the once... or so we believe. But saying we do only live for the once. We must face death with no regret. Let your fear drive you in to living a full life, one in which many people who believe in afterlife might not experience because they are inclined to see less importance with each passing day. I see my end, and I am determined to meet it knowing that I have been all I can be. For then, passing will be that much easier.

I agree with you accept the part about believing in an afterlife. Because if there is an afterlife there is no fear of death. Then you can be free to live a life to the fullest. That's why God put us here.

That is also a valid point. I just wish it were that simple for me. I want to believe in more than just an earthly existence. But I don't have enough faith in afterlife yet unfortunately.

I like so many others on here have that same fear of death. It comes over me sometimes when I see or think about something related to it. I find it very debilitating and it just stops me in my tracks. I know that it is inevitable and unstoppable but that does not make accepting it any easier. I just simply cannot deal with the fact that after one point there will be no more of my consciousness. I know that when you go to sleep there is a period of time when there is nothingness but this is only temporary. Having this occur as a permanent state of being is something I struggle with. As other people have said I wish I was a religious man. I wished in some kind of afterlife or reincarnation, but I am too logical and skeptically minded a person to do that. I need solid proof and for all the anecdotal evidence and stories that I have heard, nothing is convincing enough to reassure me of life after death. Believe me, when I say that if I did then I would be the most devout and perfectly behaved person I could. Unfortnately because I don't these religions can offer me no comfort and I am haunted daily by my fears. I know that they hold me back as I spend so much time obsessing about them and hold the belief so strongly that this life is meaningless and temporary that there is little point to trying to achieve anything. I know all the stuff people say about enjoying lfe and leaving the legacy of the kind of person you will be remembered by, but to me, I will no longer exist to care what people think so why bother trying. I am not suicidal, but because of my fear of my impending death, I find being concerned with things in this life trivial. Sorry for going on, but one last thing. I am 44 now, so I hate to think what I will be like when I am older and death is litterally just around the corner.

I'm 68 yrs old and I have no fear of death. What I do fear is pain and illness that many times comes at the end.
If you are constantly looking at your imminent death, you'll never LIVE. That's why we're here.

of course death is not the end,or we can kill, steal and do all bad things in life without caring because no one will ask us about what we did , no thing will happen we will die and thats it,so no matter what we do here on earth since at a certain day we will die and no one will punish us.we have to believe that there is a judgnment after death for all people and we will be gifted or punished for our deeds and when we do all the right things so then why to be afraid?death will be a nice soft thing will be nothing that scares.So try to do the best you can and all good deeds,help people,give from your money because you will take nothing with you just these good things you did

of course death is not the end,or we can kill, steal and do all bad things in life without caring because no one will ask us about what we did , no thing will happen we will die and thats it,so no matter what we do here on earth since at a certain day we will die and no one will punish us.we have to believe that there is a judgnment after death for all people and we will be gifted or punished for our deeds and when we do all the right things so then why to be afraid?death will be a nice soft thing will be nothing that scares.So try to do the best you can and all good deeds,help people,give from your money because you will take nothing with you just these good things you did

It kinda sounds like you're saying that the only reason we have morals is because we're scared of judgment after death? Hopefully you don't mean that.

Hi everyone. Dont worry, those who WANT to believe there is nothing after death will be dissapointed. Those who are afraid of death, please be reassured that, even though this may not help coming from a stranger, there is no such thing as"death". I'm a down to earth, normal person (least I think so!) and know for a fact that we do NOT cease to exist or "change" except for leaving our bodies. I know thats scary in itself, but we are ALL together in this. We do NOT cease to exist. I guarentee there will be someone waiting for you when you cross over. I used to have a phobia about death as well, but thanks to a friend, I now know better! Please, dont be scared. "Death" is just the beginning!!!

I understand the fear that never ends. Everything reminds me of the impending doom in my future. How can people just lay down and accept this? believe me, i totally understand. It is strange to see my thoughts written in your words because they are the same thoughts that run through my head everyday. I have become a drunk because I cant deal with it. It is the only thing that makes it go away at least for a little while.

No hard feelings it all, if I was offended by everyone's opinion that differed from my own, I'd be a very offensive person. ...not that I'm not already offensive.<br />
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I actually used a few quotes from Seneca to write my response. Seneca was a stoic philosopher who was born around the same time as Christ and yet died before the tragedy of Pompeii and Mount Vesuvieus.

I for one do not share everyone's sympathy...as much as a shocker that is...lol<br />
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Death is inevitable. You realize that. Good on you. Yet just like you won't exist, you once did not exist. Would you not think a man an utter fool for crying because he did not partake in the joys of life 1,000 years ago? A man is as much a fool for crying over the future nonexistence as he is the past nonexistence.<br />
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It would make sense if life is either a chain of seperate lives or it is as a single burst of self-awareness that eventually dies. It doesn't make sense that you once existed, but will one day not. Nor that you once did not exist, but will continue to exist.<br />
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So look at the joys of this system. You don't remember a past life do you? You don't remember once being a woman named Marisa Cohen? It's rhetorical...don't worry.<br />
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Therefore whatever happens will happen, and you don't remember it in the life after, or the nonexistence after. You have a terrible life now? You won't have a terrible life then necessarily. You might not even have a life.<br />
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But what is it about life that draws you to it so much? You've tasted food. You've delighted in drinks. I assume you've procreated around a little. You've enjoyed a few sunsets. After awhile, life offers no new experiences. Why bother? If you knew every experience, what makes yours of right now so special? If you know everything, you have nothing.<br />
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Look forward. Look behind. Look all around. Death surrounds you. At any moment it could take your life. Why bother worrying about that which is indiscriminate? Your precedence in life doesn't mean you'll die early or late. Your wealth doesn't mean you'll survive longer or shorter. Your health doesn't mean you'll add a few or lose a few years. Death is the end of what you know now. Embrace that truth. Fleeing from it is nothing short of cowardice and deceit upon your own mind.<br />
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You feel selfish? You feel you whine? Your experiences now will become nothing. What makes you, as you are now, will one day cease to exist. You cannot change that fact.<br />
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Do you feel outraged at my words? Do you feel pity for yourself? I'm curious as to your reaction.

Is good to know that some people have the same type of anxiety described with exactly the same words I'm thinking. I have thought about visiting a psychologist. Maybe that could help.

I feel everything that you are saying. I don't want to face the fact, that one day, I will die, and it will be just like before I was born. Absolutely nothing, and nothing will matter. Every memory I have will be gone. It's sad, yes, and when I think about this all, I start to cry. I hope by the time I get old and frail, they have some sort of solution, a fountain of youth would be a miracle. :[ I know it won't happen though.

I think everyone is afraid of death. I once had a dream that I lived forever and was the last living person on the earth, it got boring after awhile. I was missing my family to much. Having to watch them die really hert me inside. You dont want to live forever. Just seeing your loved ones die its hard imagine that.