Gambling Is A Disease....

I never had any interest in gambling until about 5 years ago. I used to see my new boyfriend chuck 20 in an online slot machine and magically turn it into 200. Little did I know this was going to destroy me, it suddenly consumed my whole life. For about 3 and a half years every spare penny I had was fed into online slots any winnings I had were fed straight back in. I had a baby with my boyfriend and we moved away and had a fresh start. I didn't gamble anything the whole time we were away- which was approx 18 months. Just before Xmas '12 my boyfriend told me things weren't working for him and I should move back home. I am really strapped for cash at the moment waiting to sort out Benefits etc.Anyway I got a little bit of money the other day and a little devil in my head said why don't you just have a wee shot on slots so I looked one up and started playing I did not stop playing until the bank declined the deposits.I thought perhaps because I had stopped for so long it would be ok to have a little shot but it's obviously clear now that I have zero self control when I start playing slot games. I am kind of glad this has happened now rather than when I've actually got money i guess a bit of me knew I would do this as soon as I had moved back home. Anyway I am not going to let this ruin me (again) I am giving my iPad away to a friend as I don't think I can block sites and given I would never actually walk into a bookies I think I will be ok if i remove the temptation.I think ga meetings might be a good idea for me. I did so well for so long I know I can do it I just had a little set back whilst going through a stressful time. I am determined to use all future income in a positive way for the benefit of my family.
An Ep User An EP User
Jan 12, 2013