Papa

My papa started with a form od dementia that only occured at night. He would be fine during the day, but after the sun went down, he would see things. He would see something on tv and tell you he saw it happen in the frint yard. He made my grandma cover all the mirrors in the bachroom becuase the people in there were watching her get undressed. We had to put him in a nursing home after my grandma came hom from work one night and he had a shotgun in his lap. We were afraid he would accidentally shoot her or one of us coming through the door.

Now he has sever Alzheimer's. For a while he knew who we all were. My grandma visited him everday. My mom, sister, and I visited one a week or so. Then he started slipping. He would think I was my mom or my sister was my mom when she was a little girl. He would think my mom was his sister. The day of my grandmother's funeral (she died from a blood clot after knee surgery) he was completely with us. He knew she was gone and he cried his heart out. After that he got worse. It was like he gave up.

Now I have to remind him who I am every time I see him (which I will admit is not often enough...but it kills me to see him like that). Even after I explain who I am, i'm not sure he understands...he just kind of stares at me. We don't talk. I just sit and hold his hand. Every time I leave I say the thing I used to say when I was little...hoping he is in there somewhere and remembers me if even for a split second...I say "I love my Papa!!"

The last time I visited, he asked me why my grandma hasn't visited him. I had to explain to him that she had passed away. His only response was "Ok....as long as she didn't leace me for someone else".

Its hard to see the man I spent most of my pre school days with like this. He was such a big, strong man and now he weighs maybe 110 pounds. He is so weak.
jeliebeenz jeliebeenz
18-21, F
May 28, 2010