I Have A Few But There's Only One That Really Bugs Me ...

and that's the one I have on my face, on my chin to be exact. It was a total mistake and there's a certain degree of remorse attached to it but, hey, I can't go back and change things now. I had this large raised, chocolate-colored mole on my chin. It seemed to be growing over the course of the years and didn't start to bother me until recently.

Since my mom got hers removed by a dermatologist and turned out fine, I thought to do the same. It would have been best if I had gone to the same MD she did, but it was so long ago that she didn't remember who it was. I went to another dermatologist anyway. Turns out the person who did this to me was a physician's assistant and not the real deal. I didn't know about it at the time. She assured me that I would turn out fine and never told me she wasn't a real dermatologist. She actually said I had only a 10% chance of scarring.

Well, it's been almost a year later, and now I have a red, caved-in, circular scar on my chin that looks worse than the actual mole. I've been really depressed lately because everyone stares at me. Some people have actually screamed when they saw me. This one guy yelled "Oh S%!" when I walked by him. People have even stopped in their cars as I walked by them on the sidewalk to stare at me (it's a long way from the parking lot to my work place). Things are so bad that people at work who used to talk to me don't even say hi anymore. Now I'm afraid of losing my job and then not being able to get a new one because of discrimination due to the scar.

I use tons of makeup to hide the redness, but the shape of it is still obvious because it literally looks like a crater. I might end up seeing a plastic surgeon but think I should keep waiting to see how it will look like in another year (if I can continue to bear the emotional pain). I'm still thinking of suing this so-called physician's assistant but since I signed a waiver (I think that's what it was) I doubt I have a case.

I'm just miserable. And I'm only 28. Who's going to want me now? Facing a long, miserable, lonely future ahead ...
phantasticus615 phantasticus615
31-35, F
Dec 16, 2012