I Survived And They Didn't

when i wear a short sleeved shirt I see the looks people give me.  the look of wth happened to you.  Children ask what happened.  I can't tell them but i will tell you.

On halloween after trick or treating I thought it would be fun to take my youngest children and my father to visit my mother who was in the hospital.  i live in a small town and the hospital is down the highway 30 miles or so.

With my8 year old  daughter dressed as a princessand my 4 month old son in a teddy bear suit restrained in the back seat i drove picked up my father and made the drive to the hospital.

the visit was nice and several people commented on how cute the children were. then we began the drive home.

about haif way home I saw a line of cars stopped in front of me.  There had been an accident.  I remember my daughter asking if this was a traffic jam and I began to answer....Somewhere far away i hear my father calling help her help her but his voice was strange. then nothing....we need to move her to get to the little girl... I thought to myself what a strange thing to dream get the girl..Then the most un imaginable pain throughout my body and i cried out and it raced through my mind it my daughter they are getting.....black.....hey my pants are falling off ......black.....voices far away " i don't need to go to the hospital I'm fine" " I beg to differ you were hit by a semi you need to be checked"

thats right from what i found later a semi had come up on the accident the same as i did he didn't hit his breaks but swerved into the other lane but didn't make it he hit the front of the semi 2 cars behind me. sideswiped the car directly behind me and then hit my van squarely in the rear. pushing us down and off the road through a ditch and up the other side..

I awoke at the hospital and asked about my children to be told they had been lifeflighted to a childrens hospital.  where a day later my son was declared brain dead and my daughter laid in a coma for over a month.   The 1 inch wide 16 inch long scar that runs down my left upper arm reminds me daily of my wreck.  It reminds me of my injuries, a broken neck,broken ribs and 5 breaks in my arm.  It reminds me of the loss of my son.  It reminds me of the pain and suffering my daughter went through and the fact that now she is brain damaged.  It reminds me of my father slowly dying of a brain hemorrage . 

that horrible horrible day is not only branded on my mind it is forever etched on my body.

mom2snsb mom2snsb
46-50, F
2 Responses Jan 28, 2010

I am so sorry for you and your loss. Sometimes life is so<br />
unfair. I too, am humbled by your story.

I feel your pain and it puts my scars into perspective. I am humbled by your story