My Sister Wants To Be A Man.

but heres the kicker.... we're twins. we are 3 min apart. in 8th grade she came out as a lesbian. i am a very open minded, and had no proble with her being gay. but for some reason im having trouble coming to terms with this. i know its because our relationship has always been me wanting to actualy have some sort of relationship. I dont know why im posting this, but im at my last lank. she has been able to play people to get what she wants, and i stand there and try to be spportive of her only to be met with her rage about a million other things that have nothing to do with me. I AM supporitive of her decision, and i do want to be there for her, but how can i be when im treated in such a sucky way?
bedifferent123 bedifferent123
22-25, F
1 Response Jul 20, 2010

I'm sorry to hear that you haven't been able to have a good relationship with your sibling yet, and that she isn't good to you. <br />
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I think it might be possible for you to support your sibling but not be "there" for them in the way you've been before. You don't have to put up with crap, but you can say you are supportive of their transition and you can use the male pronoun when your sibling asks you to, and so forth. But none of that should mean, in my opinion, that you have to listen to someone dumping their rage on you. Do you think that could work?

MZ is correct, you do not have to put up with anyone's rage!

But let's think for a second. "He" isn't satisfied with all that has been around his life and probably has had difficulty being understood and accepted in places that are most important to him. Think about where his rage comes from, (do you ever get angry and upset when you feel no one gets you?) We all act/react differently. Even if we are wrong, we want people to at minimum consider what we are saying.
You sound like a very compassionate sister, though you may never get exactly what you want from him, he is family, you can only hope and use supportive words and actions that don't devalue either of you.