He's 23 and I'm 20. Abused me when I was younger. I have to tip toe around him. I go to college. He doesn't. I really dislike how people seem to think As = being smart, when he's actually lazy and can't hold down a job. A lot of it isn't even As, its just that he has a ****** personality as well. I have to share a car with him: I have an internship as well as another job, do the cooking at home during the summer, and go to school 3 hours away during the school year. Yet somehow our parents still view us as equal in every way when clearly I'm the one actually putting effort into my life. I'm sick of excuses for him. I want to move out but I don't have the money. I love my parents and hate my sibling. Please don't tell me that I have to "understand" or "be there for him." Just because you may share genetics with someone, doesn't mean you have to associate with them. I want out. I can't do this anymore...
binaryGirl binaryGirl
22-25, F
2 Responses May 28, 2014

I have yet to understand my sister. She's 21; I'm 14. I try hard at everything in my life, but she doesn't try for anything. She did abuse me (see my response to nikkianni). I have PTSD from it and sometimes I want to die. It's true that I don't really trust anyone and I occasionally hate myself for being "weak." I reallly want her to move out, and though I try my hardest to understand and be kind... I just can't. The only consolation I have is that whatever she does or has done doesn't define me. When I see her I still feel guilty, sad, horrible, angry, and distressed -- a whole melting pot of emotions, but I also know that it's ok (natural, rather) to feel that way and that if I have survived this long, I am strong. I will come out of this and be able to deal with anything life throws at me.P.S. I recommend reading a book called "Way of the Peaceful Warrior"; it has helped me so much.

Your don't choose your siblings you may love them but liking is different love and hate often go together .