Help me out , what's your thought's ??

I am a 29 year old mother of two living life confined to a wheelchair !! I use to think that I knew who I was & what I wanted out of life then on a warm night in November of 2005 the rest of my life was decided for me ! I was in a car accident that left me paralyzed from the breast down , I can't even sit up by myself ! I was a 5'9 125 lb blonde bombshell with the rest of my life in front of me , I thought anyway ! Now I have to rely on help from my parent's & yes even my children to do simple tasks , I was always strong willed & stubborn I wanted to do things for myself ! How can we live in such an advanced scientific world yet simple but complex things can't be cured ? I hate what I have become , I am just a shadow of whom I use to be & I think that just maybe only if I had my legs I could be happy again ! I struggle everyday to find happiness in the small things of life I love a hug or a kiss from my girls & I am thankful to still be here to hold them but most of the time I wish that God would have just taken me home ! I live in constant pain & fight depression off as if I were at war with myself ! Is there anyone who can relate to me maybe we can help each other  I NEED ALL THE HELP & SUPPORT I CAN GET !!

parawch parawch
26-30, F
2 Responses Jun 7, 2007

I can say that i know how this feels like. Im paralyzed as a result of drunk people shooting at 9 yo kid. My injury is at level c4-c5. I can breathe on my own, but need also 24/7 care with everything. Now im 23. Ive had a lot of time to think about why this happened to me. I will never figure this out.<br />
Good luck to us, we deserve and need this!

Hi Parawch:<br />
I can completely understand how you feel as I live in that same world you do. I am now 38 years old. I was injured in a car crash 2 years ago when I was 36 years old. I broke my neck, crushed C-3-T4. I was in a coma for 14 weeks and when I woke after a few days I was told about what happened not remembering a thing about the accident. I was told by my family and drs. I was pralyzed from the neck down. I was on a vent to breath. All I could do was cry and think how did this happen to me, why me and what do I do. I have a business, 2 stroy home, and 3 kids and a husband. <br />
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After being in the hospital for 3 months, I was moved to a rehab center. Where I spent another 3 months. . Speaking was a new challenge for me and still is 2 years later. My best friend came to stay with me and he made things so much better. My other friend was an older woman and son would help me when I was in the hospital and rehab. Other than those 3 people I was alone in a world I never knew before. <br />
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Each day since the accident is a new challenge. I need and have 24/7 care. Everything is done for me. My paralysis has never improved at all. And neither has my speech. I am still on a vent to breath and other things. <br />
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So I can completely understand your world. If you or anyone would like to chat or talk please feel free to email me at snugglesmylove@aol.com. Good luck on your journey and God Bless.