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My Husband And I Think He Has Did

My husband and I have been married for almost three years and have a one year old little girl. Over the past three years we've talked about all of the things that go on in his head. There are things that he doesn't remember, most recently it was a giant stuffed duck that he had bought me. He asked where it came from and has no memory of making me buy it. My husband constantly hears his alters. They argue and scream and cause him headaches and such. As far as we know he has two "littles", 5 others that I know of and probably more. I am a stay at home mom while my husband is a ranch hand. My husband is scared to talk to anyone about his problems because he doesn't want them to try and "fix" him. He doesn't want to lose certain alters. I'm left at a stand still. I don't know what to do. Being a mother of a young one I need a break from time to time. Depending on my husbands current alter I never know what I'll get. A lot of the time I end up being a single mother of two or three depending on if my husband is only one of his littles or both. I will not leave him because of this, but we need to handle it. I don't care if the alters totally go away, I just want my husband to be able to cope and live a happy life with myself and our daughter. I want to be selfish and say I need me time and I want my husband, the one person I married. But my husband is a mixture of so many people and I love him as is. How do you do it? Do you struggle with your marriage and find the strength somewhere to take care of so many alters?
wyomingsahm wyomingsahm 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 28, 2011

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Hi, the other thing that we found that really helps is when your husband has alot of noise in his head.
Try putting earphones on and listening to music :)
Please feel free to friend me and ask any questions you may have as this is not by any means an easy road and can feel very lonely a lot of the time.

Your husband really needs to go to therapy. To "fix him" doesn't mean that any of the alters have to go away. It just mean finding ways and new skills to deal with life. To get over the traums they suffered. To recognize the triggers. To grow. If a therapist says he needs to integrate then I would find a new one. They don't have to go anywhere unless your husband or them want that. <br />
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I know how you feel being a mother to so many. I am a mother 90% of the time right now. It is very hard sometimes. Communication is the best thing you can have. <br />
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If he listens to his alters and gains control things will be better. There has to be cooperation within the system. If there is and they agree on who is out and they are aware of each other the headaches won't be so bad.

I agree with xxxLisaxxx
Most times the headaches are caused due to the fact that another alter is trying to be out. Often they don't need much time out as I found they get tired quickly. So maybe you could ask him if an alter needs to come out. :)

mpde