Listen To MeI have something to say... a story to tell. I'm not sure what it is or why I feel compelled to tell it, but I know I’ve got something to say: I've got lessons to share, secrets to reveal, and feelings to impart. But I can't find a voice. A way to talk without sounding like I’m giving a lecture, or preaching to some made up congregation. Is it possible that my strange life is some self fulfilling fantasy? Has it been plain and pedestrian? Have my life struggles, victories, and failures really been minor tussles, small gains, and resignations?
I lived in West Berlin when I was 12, Israel when I was 16, and San Diego at 19. I had a great pad in San Francisco, and a spot on the floor of a homeless shelter in San Jose. I went from being a well paid and respected company man, travelled in a multitude of towns in 43 states and met with boards of directors for some of the largest most successful businesses in the world, to being an anxious, depressed, and bankrupt, wreck of a man with no esteem, or confidence. I've skied in five states, and done drugs in three. I’ve loved and lost, lived lustfully, been betrayed, and lost friends and family.
I've felt alone amongst many, and supported around none.
I've decided to practice the skill of telling what needs to be told. To try and entertain, teach, and share. I'm afraid of being inconsequential... Is this the way to be relevant?
captainkirkwood 41-45, M 21 Responses 9 Aug 17, 2012