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I Have A Terminal Illness

My Story

By: omelettegod
Written on July 16th, 2011
i was diagnosed with a (then) non-operable brain tumor in 2001 and was told I had less than a 50% to survive the next 5 years.  it's been 10 years now since the diagnosis and i should be happy to be alive, but i'm not.  I've had at least 4 surgeries and radiotherapy and most days I fight to keep my sanity.  i experience simple partial seizures daily despite taking medication against it - i worry every time that the tumor is active and hungrily eating into yet another part of my brain, taking my being away bit by bit (i'm missing most of my right temporal and frontal lobes and it's starting to grow into the motor cortex so I can expect the seizures to get worse).  I get checked over by MRI once every 3 months, next one is Aug 5 - the last one was in April and showed no new growth following radiation, but if i'd known how bad the radiation + drugs (decadron) would've been I might not have elected for it.  it took me close to a year to get over the side effects and during that time i turned 40 and got the statement " I want a divorce' as a birthday present from my wife.  SO it's been a hard ride.  the only thing that keeps me going on a regular basis is that I've 2 boys (9 & 11 y.o) to take care of while their mom is working.  So long as I've something to do during the day I seem to be ok, it's in the evenings after the kids are in bed and I'm basically by myself.  maybe I should be posting this in a depression group instead - I don't know.  anyways, that's my sad little story. 
By: omelettegod
Age: 41-45
439 people have read this story

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4 responses
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    nukechica
    nukechica

    I am terribly sorry to hear your story. I do not know anyone closely who has gone through malignant cancer treatment, but it is a topic that interests me. Have you heard of Dr. Stanislaw Burzynski? A friend recommended it to me on Netflix, and although I have not source checked the information portrayed in the film, it offers hope that there are innovative researchers who believe in alternate treatment methods. His medical facility is in Texas.



    I do not want to offer you false hope or a cure. This would be research you would have to have the strength and courage to pursue on your own. His research sounds more promising than what the FDA has authorized for treatment of cancers, especial with the success rate reported in comparison with conventional treatment. Many conventional doctors consider him a "quack", but the documentary supports information why the NCI was unable to duplicate the response he gets. I don't know if this is an answer or option for you, but I am truly sorry for your state. Thank you for being so brave and sharing your story.

    Dec 6, 2011
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    generalen123
    generalen123

    Be strong brother. Keep going and never give up!!!! Be strong Brother. Much love

    Dec 5, 2011
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    LateNightOwl
    LateNightOwl

    I have a similar story only not from a tumor and without the boys.

    I have tunnels in my brain and almost zero of my actual person remains but I would like to over given our similarities, well the sentence "stick together" comes to mind but I don't know how to word it to what I'm trying to say, again because of my lacking brain functionality.

    Hoping you get the gist of it and hope to keep in contact.

    I learned letting my ADHD go wild helps with the frustration, or depression or general bother of things for me, so, perhaps you could just do things that make less sense to you? with randomness?

    Probably didn't help but I hope it did hope you're doing better soon.

    Jul 17, 2011
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    Anto815
    Anto815

    Let me start by saying my heart goes out to you. I can only imagine what your going through. It is said that "Nobody" knows what your going through until they have gone through it themselves...I myself have a horrible illness but know is not the place to tell..I wish i could take away your pain and problems but i cant but what i can do is offer to be your friend so if you like please friend me and please message me so i may know how your feeling. I don't know you but i really do care. All the best.

    Jul 16, 2011
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