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It Does Things To You...

 I no longer can take any more. It has done things to me, that I hate to admit. Like it has made me more clingy. I tend to get attached too easily. I feel the need to prove myself to friends and family. I get scared easily, and when someone in my life leaves, I start to feel responsible. I blame myself for others mistakes, I ignore other's mistakes, just so they will like me. I had to lie in the past to get friends. I felt bad, but I felt like I had to, just so I would be liked. It goes along with rejection. I don't do it anymore, but I still fight the urge to lie occasionally. I'm trying really hard to not get clingy, but its just so hard! 

When parents abandon you, so many things go through your head. Why didn't they want me? What did I do wrong? Is it because of my looks? But I was just a baby! I've been told that its just them and they didn't want a kid. But my mom obviously did, she had another one. Then she married again, and likes her new kids more. But what about my dad? What did I ever do? He didn't even know me! How could he even decide if he wanted me? But still...something doesn't seem right.
ForeverAndAlways001 ForeverAndAlways001 18-21, F 3 Responses May 3, 2011

Your Response


You are such a sweet girl,i love you.

You know, I never thought of it that way. Thanks for the new insight! :D<br />
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Aris, you make me almost cry sometimes. Thank you so much! I'm trying, trying so hard to forget about what goes on. I try to focus on friends, but sometimes its just so hard! I can't thank you enough Aris!