Sorry, Body

I kind of feel bad, really, when I think over it all. Whoever or whatever being or bad luck put me in this body must be really pissed off at the way I've treated it thus far into my life. From when I was young and used to romp around with my sisters or my friends, skinning knees and pulverising elbows, with no regard to the reprecussion, just having a good time and not feeling any pain. Really doing it an injustice when I was a little older, by wearing really crappy clothes and no bra while I was still adjusting to not actually being a boy and growing boobs when most of my friends (who were guys) weren't. That really pissed me off. Pushing it harder and harder every game, every practice, every evening after supper when I'd go out and cycle so I would stay in shape. Thing is, I never really got in shape. To the recent past, completely scarring this body whenever I get the irrepressible urge to marr the skin on the inside of my wrist with a sharp blade. The even more recent present, denying it nourishment and "getting rid" of as much nourishment I can whenever I can. Downright hating it.

Sorry body, I'm trying to change. It may take a while though. On the other hand, I'm really not that sorry.
fadingvioletdawn fadingvioletdawn
18-21, F
4 Responses Aug 3, 2011

mainly volleyball now

What sport?

Please don't cut yourself....

lol, some apology!