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Why Nobody Cares

The title is not misleading. I want to know why most of the general public does not want to acknowledge the existence or severity of adult ADHD. Only suffers and the families of suffers know what I mean. There is this myth that ADHD'ers are lazy and unmotivated. That our disorder can be cured by mind over matter. That this disorder is he result of nothing more doctors trying to push pills on young children.

This disorder exists. It is debilitating. It affects millions of adults and countless more who refuse treatment for fear of ridicule. You may ask yourself, how is ADHD a disability? I, as a sufferer, can still walk, talk, work, play. Millions of adults suffer from cancer, MS, Parkinson's, and ALS. How dare I call myself disabled when others suffer from those terrible diseases? Newsflash, ADHD is crippling in its own way. Suffers face the following difficulty:

with work
with relationships
with school
with insomnia
with driving
staying motivated
finishing projects

Are you reading this now, those who are fortunate not to suffer from ADHD? Do you take for granted any of the actions I mentioned above? Do you know the frustration of having a personal, economic, and educational goals moved further out of reach? What if you keep reaching for the stars and the stars kept moving away? What if you lied alone in your bed at night, your mind set ablaze with a million thoughts, unable to sleep? What if you kept seeing your peers surpass you despite your hardest efforts? What if the doctors who classified you as an ADHD'er and then refused to treat you? What if the only class of drugs proven effective for ADHD was one of the most abused substances on Earth, making it harder to obtain medically and legally?

You, who suffered in silence, are not alone. I proudly support ADHD'ers and their right to live life with this disease free of judgement.
collegestag08 collegestag08 26-30, M 16 Responses Dec 28, 2011

Your Response


I grew up with adhd and my problem wasn't that nobody believed me it was that everyone knew. The principal at my school hated kids with disabilities and used to announce to the whole school every day the names of all the children who were on mediccation and what they were on it for. As a result all the other kids constantly called me a retard and a freak and so on, but the teachers refused to step in so it would get to the point where I would snap and beat the living **** out of the kids who picked on me. As a result i would get sent home at least once a week for being violent, while the kids who made my life a living hell got off scott free. The violence led to the school informing all the parents that I was dangerous and that they should keep their kids away from me. This cost me the few friends I had and because of it from the time i was 8 until I got to high school I had no friends, spent all my time alone and developed a deep seated rage which to this day still flares up from time to time, just this overwhelming hate for all the so called "normal people" where I literally cannot be around people because I turn into a total *******. Sorry for the long post can anyone relate?

You pretty much summed up What I used to think About my adhd When I was growing up and in highschool. Thanks for getting the words out that I never had the guts to say outloud. (:

when we stop deal with ADHD as a problem , and deal with it as a gift ,
then we will find the way to control the side effect .

very well said :)

-a fellow adult ADHD sufferer

Thank you for writing this, you couldn't be more correct.
My longtime on and off girlfriend and others I know, including doctors, believe at best that adhd only affects children, and that they grow out of it . well i'm 34, and have been diagnosed 3 times in my life starting at 6 years old, and then recently by one of the top adhd doctors in Canada.
yet she still thinks its all in my head, that i can just change the way I am by smarting up and doing what i need to do like everyone else to organize my life, not act and speak spontaneously and a thousand other things she disapproves and criticizes me for that I really don't have control over.

Its not a easy life as a adhd adult, we work 10 times harder at accomplishing the same given tasks norms (normal people) do naturally.
The only way to truly succeed is to do what we love the most, use the hyper focus super power to our advantage and make our own way. but there's no guarantees.
For me personally, I focus on a lot of things, i love information, all kinds of info ! i don't watch TV, but before bed I find something interesting on usually to do with space or technology. I like computers, electronics, software, promotion and advertising, electronic music production (although i've never finished a whole song before changing interest), and fixing basically anything you can think of, and if i don't know how to fix it, there's always the information junkies best friend, GOOGLE.
I change my mind on careers more times than a road rager changes lanes.

We are explorers plain and simple. If all electricity and technology were to get wiped out and we had to start over with nothing, half if not more of people just wouldn't survive, but we would due to our unlimited interest and quick thinking.

Never sell yourself short because of ADHD, be proud and use the abilities ADHD gives you.

Thanks again collegestag08

Omg yess! Very well said man. Ugh I just shed a tear thankyou so much:'}

That last part made sparks fly in my head lol!

Well... some do care, but really, people don't tend to be interested in things that don't affect them or people they know well. They don't get it and don't try to. On one hand, that is sad and we ought to try to take care of each other in this life... but then again, we'd all lose our minds if we had to put energy and mental space into every condition and issue out there, even just the common ones. How much do you care about disorders you don't have? I don't mean to sound rude, it's just human nature and we can't all be invested in everything out there.

I strongly support your initiative to stand by those who suffer from the so-called ADHD. I am personally diagnosed with it but i refused to take any meds because they are horrible. It's just a different way of thinking with the symptoms you mentioned. The bright side of it is that you see things from a perspective that others cant. academic researchers know what I mean; the most successful of those are those who have ADHD. good luck mate

i got diagnosed with it a couple of years ago, and all the neurologist did was give me a bottle of pills. It made it even harder to concentrate, I felt all jittery and couldn't block out everyone's conversations. So I stopped taking it. I didn't even believe I had ADHD because I just assumed that since I wasn't hyper I can't have it.

But after stumbling upon an article about ADHD, I understand myself so much better now. All the symptoms that I had, I've always thought were because I wasn't good enough. Or I just needed to try harder.

I wish more people (especially teachers) had a deeper understanding of ADHD. I remember being scolded for not raising my hand or being treated differently for not doing well in class. My younger sister also has ADHD and keeps being judged as someone who is lazy or doesn't care about school, when she really does. I just feel so helpless sometimes trying to explain to people what ADHD is, and it isn't as simple as they think it is.

Dont forget hyperfocus as far as I know thats a superpower reserved for us "gifted folk"

I'm a 28 year old male, struggling through college (2nd attempt). I was diagnosed with ADD in 6th grade, and it was horrifying. I was the kid that got called out of class to visit with the school psychologist. At the time, it was the "psycho" kids that had to see the psychologist. I was forced to take special ed classes at the very same school, which was located near the lockers - and of course, everyone knew what the room was for the "special kids". I hid every single day, waiting for the halls to clear before making my way to the class. It utterly destroyed my confidence. Ritalin, cylert, wellbutrin, etc. I've been on them all. <br />
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After quite a few years, some growing and maturing, I'm still an utterly terrible student. I recently have begun to look into adult ADD/ADHD, and was shocked with what I've been finding. Articles such as this are incredibly powerful. Many of the stories feel as though they written about me! As I sit here, putting off an essay that's due in 12 hours, watching television and switching back and fourth between games on my phone and my laptop. I can't help but get upset with myself. I've seen this before - and it's incredibly draining. I'll likely stay up late writing, but I probably won't complete the paper. I'll convince myself that I will have plenty of time in the morning (the paper is due at 7:45am) to complete it. Then I'll go to bed. Instead of sleeping though, I'll lye there thinking about the paper, about school in general. I'll think about what I'm going to eat for lunch the next day, and if I've set my alarm. Eventually I'll sleep, however, when I wake up I'll be exhausted. Too tired to get writing right away. I'll have to make coffee, and listen to the radio. Check my emails and of course, Facebook. By the time I've completed all of those things, I'm already late for class, and I haven't yet completed the paper. <br />
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To some of you, I'm sure it sounds utterly pathetic. And I would agree 100%, yet I'm still sitting here, still watching tv. This is my life - and has been for 28 years. It's incredibly frustrating, constantly disappointing the people around you. What's worse is the consistent personal disappointment, one failure after another. It leaves you drained without confidence or pride. <br />
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The good news is that I'm not alone, and that there have been advancements in treatments since I was in the 6th grade. I'll be speaking with a professional over the summer to attempt to get a handle on my life. I can only be positive and hope for the best. I realize that I can't depend on medications or counseling alone, so I'll need to put in the effort if I'm going to succeed at making a change. <br />
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Keep sharing your story. It really is helpful.

Thank you for sharing. Adult ADHD/ADD is a not just a disease, it is a life long struggle. Like salmon swimming upstream, we will make it someday with hard work and determination. Thank you for sharing your story and lending your strength to the rest of us.

I am definitely a salmon right now!

yea i saw my peers surpass me due to my adhd. not fun

I always credit my adhd as beinv why i excelled. I would never pay attention in class, never take notes or do homework but come test time i would go intp hyperfocus and all the answers would just pop into my head. However if i made any attempt to study then i wouldnt be able to remember anything. Funny how that works the harder I try the worse I fail but if I dont care about something I excel at it.

yea i saw my peers surpass me due to my adhd. not fun

yea you are right.

I have to disagree with you on the title. There are many of us who care!! I'm doing Psychiatry right now, and the institute I study with are working intensively on identifying the genes and risk factors associated with ADHD, both in children and adults. All in order to identify and hopefully one day treat the symptoms effectively. I have recently been in a discussion on a study looking closely at the association of genetics of ADHD in males individuals too. As I'm sure you probably already know that it is more commonly diagnosed in males. <br />
Though I do agree with you that there still lack good intervention, management and treatment for ADHD. <br />
It is great that you try raising the awareness in this topic. Always very insightful from your perspective!

Thank you for your insight, The title is meant to grab attention.

Yep deffinatli i am told its bcos many only have add and as they are not hyper and distruptive they tend to slip through the cracks and possibly sums teachers and schools dont seem to know much about adhd. I had adhd and slipped throgh d cracks only got diagnosed at 21

I have ADHD combined and also slipped through the cracks because I was 'gifted', yet my talents were not utilised. No-one was looking for it partly for the same reason as need to be free and the other because of my race. I had taken to bringing prompt cards with me to the GP because I get flustered they treat you like its a production line and so I bullet point what I have to say and try and get through all even though what happens is they pick the easiest thing and then send you away and you leave thinking ****! Anyhoo, I recently found one of my cards and read it post diagnosis at the tender age of 26 and found that I had clearly identified a number of ADHD symptom and yet my GP did nothing and basically abused and left me with a physical disability for my troubles. Now I know I am starting a campaign to educate ethnic communities about the condition in the hopes that for other women like me in their prime never have to live with this condition as a disability.

Ummm, what is it? What is ADHD? I'm srry I'm so oblivious to what yer saying...

Attention Deficient Hyperactivity Disorder. It's a mental disorder that makes it difficult to focus and concentrate.

Oh. Well I have a something called Schizotypal spectrum disorder. It means I prefer fantasy over reality. Itz natural. My father has it. Altho hez dead to me.

To help you learn how to forgive that image that is now carved in your soul I would advise the book: " a Course In Miracles". It will help you understand. It´s your shoice to take my advise or not. Hope I could help. Love you. Big hug

i was looking through some papers the other day and found i had been diagnosed with adhd when i was 8. no one ever told me (im 20 now) my mom keeps saying that all those disorders are just "mind over matter" yeah i know where you are coming from, i really wish i had known about my adhd a long time ago, i have beat myself up for years, and gotten yelled at for everything until i feel useless. i wish more people knew the truth and wasnt so quick to judge. while i am slightly glad i didn't take any of those medications, i am upset no one seemed to notice how much i struggled. <br />
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i do plan on searching for an alternative treatment though, there are several reasons right now i cant get the usual medications.

I know exactly what you mean, I never knew what ADHD was as a kid and I was a classic case, and never really did anything about until I was about 21 when I could make the choices and my own decisions. My mother still this day still thinks its in my head, even though im 99% positive it comes from her.

Exactly the same for me! A few months ago I was prompted to do a bit of research and I'm positive I'm ADHD. All the articles and experiences of others are exactly the way I think/feel/behave. I haven't seen anyone yet, but I need to. I just don't have the money, and I don't want to talk to my mum about it, cause I'm sure she'll just say 'you're just being lazy' etc, when I know it's not that. I think she has it too, but she'd never admit it or do anything for it if she knew. Arg!!!

About two months ago I thought like that... the negative thoughts of ADHD. You see, my brother... the bad one, had ADHD. Growing up, my mom used to say things like, "you're just like your brother" whenever I did something she didn't like. So I grew up thinking that having ADHD made the person bad. However, upon doing research for a Human Biology class about ADHD and the medication given for it, did I realize that there is more to it. And after looking at a list of fifteen traits an adult with ADHD could have, I realized that there is a strong possibility that I also have it (I had fourteen of them). At that time, I was devastated, because the words of my mom were still in my head ... that I must be a bad person. But that's not it at all. To make this story short... because I could go on in great detail ha ha! ... I went in for testing and will get results on January 5. Now I'm worried that they are going to tell me that there is nothing wrong with me and that I'm this huge screw up. <br />
Anyways, I really like your post. More people should learn about ADHD instead of assuming it's just laziness. I mean, if they knew what goes through my head everyday... theirs would probably blow up. I have so much self hate because I LOVE to craft and I have started projects everywhere.... some are going on six years now. Okay, I'm done now.. haha!

Wow, your story is heartbreaking... I think most people don't know anything about adult ADHD... keep spreading the word... good luck and peace to you...

Thank you Hippiechick. The last story I posted about ADHD came off as kind of whiny. This was my second attempt to honestly explain how I feel, and to hopefully make others feel better.