Life Inside The Boxi only recently found out that what was going on with me was called agoraphobia. i also suffer from borderline personality disorder and major depressive disorder so i thought my symptoms had something to do with that. two and a half years ago, my boyfriend at the time shot and killed one of our close friends apparently for no reason except retaliation against something really stupid. anyway, i lost most of my "friends" because of it and the boyfriend got life in prison. i had to testify against him in the trial. since then, i havent been able to really go anywhere alone and i freak out in places like wal mart. i live with my mom and stay in my room most of the time. i go to therapy once a week and my therapist is suggesting that i at least take my puppy for a 15 min walk everyday. i just want all this to go away so i can be me again
May 16, 2013 An Update to my Story
I would like to proudly say that therapy and meds have definitely paid off. I stuck with it and refused to give up. I thank everyone on here who was so supportive of me and told me to just take my time <3 I'm proud to say that I now have my own apartment with my dog Gracie (always by my side) and a boyfriend who is truly supportive. I still go to therapy twice a month and am still on meds for depression and panic attacks/anxiety. I'm able to go into stores like Wal-mart alone and shop for brief periods of time and I even babysit a few of my friends children for them. My disability came through which helps alot. I also have to thank my mom for not giving up on me. Although she is not my biological mother, she has been the closest person I have. She has made sure I followed through with everything I needed to do to start the baby steps towards my healing. I couldnt have made it this far without her. I'm not all the way there yet but I have made huge improvements and I'm proud of myself. This is a testimonial to anyone who thinks that they can't or won't ever make it past "Life inside the box." Keep trying and never give up and allow yourself the time to heal properly. Rome wasn't built in a day. I'm such a more positive person than I used to be and I'm grateful for all the beauty that God surrounds us with everyday. I no longer feel crippled by all my disorders. Thanks to EP for letting me tell my story. Thanks everyone!!