Am I Crazy?
I am dying for people's advice on this issue.
I am a 22 year old dating my best friend of 7 years. We have been together about 2 years. I've been feeling crazy lately, and need some advice. We planned on staying together forever, but now I've been feeling like a breakup is inevitable, but how do you break up with your only close friend? I am co dependent and sensitive, he's a high functioning alcoholic. Ugh. He lives with his best guy friend, who is an alcoholic as well- but here is the thing- they aren't like "normal"alcoholics. They have no remorse for anything, and get away with a lot... their jobs have both seen them drunk but don't fire them, they have destroyed their apartment, but are so "intelligent" that they got out of evictions from damage (while drinking) unpayed bills, and have survived law trouble. I think our relationship is suffering from the alcohol. Is he still an alcoholic if he doesn't verbally abuse me or hit me or drink and drive? He gets really aggressive (sometimes playfully) and intimidates me- but he says its not an issue because he doesn't hurt me. When he drinks with others he passes out WAY before anyone that comes to his apartment is even drunk. He drinks at school, and he has drunk "days" with friends.
I told him it was going to be over if he didn't get better because on Halloween he did a minor hit and run at a stop light with me in the car when he was "more drunk than he thought". But then he got angry at me when I got upset when he started drinking again 5 days later. I thought a break from drinking would be longer... He passed out at his sister's wedding, before an hour was up at the reception... And the other night he was supposed to drop off my computer as I needed to sign up for classes in the morning, but I drove out late that night to pick it up when I didn't hear from him and he was passed out in the bathroom. I got a little upset and he told me I was over reacting. He is ALWAYS telling me I over react. Am I? I don't know anymore. I am a little too sensitive, but I can't tell if this behavior is acceptable sometimes. I haven't heard from him in in 48 hour except a text saying "Sry babe, I meant to drop the computer off but Josh came over and we got drunk. I love you." He will never stop drinking- his whole family is pretty passionate about it- it's what they do when they get together. My last problem is that he finds it impossible to give a genuine apology, or want to change. And that is what makes me feel crazy. I'ts frustrating that he thinks I am the issue. Please tell me what I should do? If I am going to have to break up with him, how can I do it successfully with someone who is my best friend?
Thank you so much
I've just been so bummed lately