Doctors ....:(!

So went to my fortnight check up at my doctors.... Asked how I was, weighed me, blood pressure, the lot

Stupidly told her I had been feeling really ill .... Tummy cramps, dizzy, faint, terrible migraines.... Not feeling like I'm actually doing anything and someone else is making do what I need to do ... Etc

Took bloods, could tell she was concerned about me admitting that I felt like this

Turns out if I deprive my brain/body of food anymore to the extreme extent that I have in the past then I could go just like that, I'm on a clock ticking away faster and faster.... The fact that I can't be thin be the person I want to be or I will die is horrendous, obv I want to live but I do anything to be thin it's killing me

To see/hear others suffering from eating disorders kills me I want to be able to pair up and get thin with you all but, for me to wish this on anyone is a sin, I want that person to confined in and loose weight with and share secrets but I defiantly can't watch someone go through what I'm going through...

What a messed up life I live

Love and thoughts to all out there with edxxx
Framsay Framsay
18-21, F
Dec 7, 2012