It Started One Day In 7th Grade...

In 7th grade I was severly depressedso I was kind of vonerable. It was a time for experimenting and a lot of change in my life. I hated myself and I was so sad I was never hungry. After a while even when I was hungry I couldn't eat..not because I didn't want to but the food just discusted me..it looked fake ....and it just grossed me out...but one day... I decided I wanted to loose weight. I remember thinking to myself..I'm not going to be like one of those anorexic girls because I can stop whenever I want..and boy was that the biggest mistake of my life! I didn't eat much but in 8th grade I finally gained weight. That freaked me out so I went back to my old ways thinking it was so awful but I lost some weight. In 9th grade things got a little worse...I ran cross country and didn't eat much so I got down to the 80's. I'm not that tall but it was still kind of thin. I'm going to be a sophmore this year and at the moment I'm doing really good...I still have my moments of weakness and I still constantly think about my body or food...but I'm trying, I REALLY AM! I just want to be healthy and happy...is that to much to ask?

Eskimo Eskimo
18-21, F
Jul 29, 2007