Walking On Eggshells

My boyfriend, lets call him Mathew, is an extremely jealous person. Mathew is a very popular person, he knows and is friends with all these amazing people, many of them are girls. Now I dont mind him having other female friends, however, he has a habit of being extremely flirtatious with them and often is very touchy. He admits, without me ever bringing it up, that he flirts A LOT. Many of these girls don't like me at all for various reasons. Mostly they just don't want me dating him. Most of these girls have crushes on him. I have never once told my boyfriend not to hang around these girls.
Now, I have few friends as it is, most of them boys, a few are girls. Mathew doesn't want me to hang out with ANY of them. If I'm with my girlfriends and not him he refuses to speak to me. He has told me "you can't hang out with them (my guy friends) when I'm not around."
He's not just jealous, he's a hypocrite too. Sometimes I just want to ask him, "So you're allowed to always be around these girls who have crushes on you and who you flirt back with and im not allowed to spend time with my only friends?"
There's this one girl he calls his f*** buddy. Of course its just a joke but if I even say another guys name, not even in that sort of manner, Mathew will ignore me for as long as possible.
He's constantly doing and saying things that break my heart. I try talking to him about it but either he'll wave it off,take on a snide attitude about it later in the comments he makes, or beat himself up over it. He already hates himself to the maximum, and I don't like making him feel that way because that's never the intent.
Mathew gets angry very easily and he overreacts about most everything. Sometimes its hard not to cry around him.
It also makes me feel weird that his friends dont like me. I really like them but I guess they don't see me as a good fit for him. Mathew always tries to get me to do things with him and his group because he doesnt see (or doesn't care) that they dont want me around. And he will get offended if I say "no thanks, you should spend time with your friends without me." 'THEY DONT LIKE ME. I dont want to ruin their activity.' Is what I want to say.
I haven't hung out with my friends alone in so long. Well thats not true, I hung out with his brother when Mathew was still asleep. He was PISSED.
He's really an amazing person, jealousy is the main problem with the relationship. It's just a little exhausting sometimes.
EmmyL EmmyL
18-21, F
1 Response Jan 6, 2013

Honestly, I think you should leave him, it seems like he does not know what he really wants. Speak to him, tell him exactly how you feel and if he doesn't change for the better, don't waste your time. Life is too short to be worrying and being effected over these things. There are plenty of fish in the sea! Remember, if anything happens, it happens for a reason! Good luck! :)