Awkward

 "I have an inferiority superiority complex."

Well, according to my friend, I do. 
It makes sense. I am taking two AP classes and two honors classes, yet I feel like I suck at life. I feel like everyday serves solely to remind me why everyone surpasses me in every skill. I am the co-editor in chief of the school paper, the executive director of the literary mag, color guard captain, and I started a club-founder and president. Still, I have experienced too much criticism and backlash to believe that I am worthy of these positions and accomplishments. At times I think I'm like everyone else making mistakes and getting better with time. It's not true though. I hate it so much. I hate living because it doesn't work for me. I just feel like I truly suck at life. I feel as though I will never get into the school I want to attend; I will never reach my potential as a writer, or if I do my skills will come up short; I will never help anyone, but rather, I will remind everyone how I am mediocre; I will never stop disappointing people. 

I hope no one thinks I'm self-indulged, but I probably sound like I am. In fact, I probably am. Whatever. 

Anyway, I don't know. The only way my life could get worse is if I get knocked up like all of my half-sisters have...or a drug dealer...or a high school dropout.
 

I don't know...I'm sorry. This is rambling. All right. I'm done with this.

 


 

dksolis dksolis
18-21
1 Response Feb 18, 2009

I certainly hear what you are saying.