Getting Felt Up At The Doctor's Office: First Breast Exam

For some reason, once I hit a certain age, I think about 16 or so, going to the doctor always felt like a potential sexual assualt. 

There was one incident with a doctor when I was a child... but I'll write about that in some future post.  For the most part though, before I turned 16, the worse thing about going to the doctor was that I might get a shot or two; I didn't consider it an exectionaly scarry place to go. 

But once I hit that certain age... everytime I went, whether it was for pneumonia, strepthroat or a simple rash on my arm, they'd always try and pressure me to get a breast and pelvic exam.  Luckily for me, my mom was able to protect me.  The nurse would come in and tell me to remove all my clothes, including panties and bra, and put on the gown.  I'd get upset at this, sometimes even tearing up, and my mom would go out and talk to them and then I wouldn't have to do it. 

I kept doging the bullet, but it really made me hate doctors. 

Then came the doctor's office first victory... my going to college. 

Through middle and highschool, I didn't participate in any team sports run through the school system (I did swim team through childhood and part of middle school, but it was privately run), so I was never required to get a sports physical, so I had no experience with this school mandated kind of thing.  But the college I decided to attend required a physical to be able to live in the dorms and you had to live in the dorms as a freshmen.  

I was scared, but it looked like on the form that I really just had to get a shot or two, so I thought maybe it would be okay. 

But it wasn't okay. 

I was told once I was there I had to have both pelvic and breast exams if I wanted them to sign the stupid form. 

I was so pissed off and scared at the same time... what right did they have to force me like this? It really did feel like somekind of rape type situation (the thought of which now kind of turns me on), but I was supposed to be alright with it since it was medical type people saying that it was neccesary.  I was still a virgin and there was no history of breast, ovarian or cervical cancer within either side of my family. 

How could they force this on me?

Anyways, I  was in tears and I guess they felt a little bad for me since they changed their minds.  They said I could skip the pelvic this time, though it really needed to be done soon (didn't end up doing it until I was 25 or 26 I think; nothing was found wrong with me despite not having it until I was actually sexually active), but the breast exam was mandatory. 

I agreed, so I put the gown on without a bra, which was hard to do and extremely embarrassing, but I felt rather thankful that my panties were still in place. 

A nurse practitioner ended up being the one to do the exam; she was tall and had short blond hair and a big blue beaded necklace on.   She was nice and friendly and talked a lot to me before asking me to get into position. 

Then she had me slip the gown from my shoulders and lay on my back, hands behind my head.  It was hard to force myself to get into this extremely humiliating position, but somehow I managed to do it since she seemed so friendly. 

She then proceeded to give me what felt like a deep tissue massage of my breasts.  It was a bit shocking; I'd never been touched there before and now someone was not just touching, but touching rather hard. 

As she was doing this, she kept talking.  I was still shaking so I'm sure she thought talking alot would make me feel better, but it was so odd having a normal conversation while someone was, rather roughly, feelling you up. 

She told me I looked like a cousin of hers and then asked if I was of nordic descent.  I said I wasn't sure, didn't really know what she meant at the time.  I guess she asked that since I have blond hair and green eyes, but they come from a combination of british, welsh, italian and german blood.  I think she thought I was from denmark or sweeden or something. 

The whole time she was rather thouroughly massaging my breasts, I couldn't help staring at that big blue beaded necklace she was wearing, the beads were covered in little black swirling patterns, and then I couldn't help looking a little farther down at her cleevage.  I ­wondered if someone else had done this to her too?

It was a weird thought to think that fully adult women routinelly submitted to having not only breast exams, but someone also feeling up between their legs.  I felt a little tingling at this thought that someday in the future I'd have to fully submit to the medical community and allow some doctor to see and touch all my private spots, not just my breasts. 

The breast exam seemed to last a fare amount of time as she was talking so much and so my trembling finally subsided.  I was getting aclamated to feeling hands touching me where no one had touched me like this before and it was no longer quite so scarry or embarrassing, and then that's when she took the experience to a whole new level... 

she squeezed one of my nipples supper hard

I was stunned; the massage had felt a little rough, but I hadn't expected to be violated in quite that way.  I asked her why she had done that.  She appologized for not having warned me, but she needed to check if there was any liquid in there that might come out. 

She said she'd have to do it the other side too, so please bare with it. 

Again, it made me jump; I swear she did the second one even harder.

I was sore there for days after the fact, she did it so hard, making me recall my exposure and submission experience again and again. 

I kind of wonder why she had been so rough on my breasts; she had a really nice personality so I guess she was just committed to being thorough in her exam.
WindRose WindRose
31-35, F
4 Responses May 7, 2012

I have had quite a few of these exams and never not once had anyone squeeze my nipples.

That's weird... Every exam since then that I've had, they always do it, just not as hard and painful as she did it. If you go to this link:

http://m.hopkinsmedicine.org/healthlibrary/conditions/adult/breast_health/how_to_perform_a_breast_self-examination_bse_85,P00135/

It explains how to do a self breast exam.

Step 4 is:
"Gently squeeze each nipple and look for a discharge."

If your doctor doesn't do this, they're missing a pretty common step of breast exams.

Must be a girl thing ... Those types of exams , even when dr s. feel us guys up it doesn't compare, to that story. Glad you got over it.

My family isn't very touchy feely; I can probably count on one hand the number of hugs I got growing up; my mom especially wasn't much of a cudler. If someone did hold me in their lap, or carry me on their shoulders or held me when I was sleeping when I was really small, like between the ages of 3 to 5, it was usually my dad and he pretty much stopped too when I was about 6 or 7 since my little sister was then the baby. My friends growing up would tease me because I didn't like them to hug me.

I didn't realize what I had been missing out on until my first serious boyfriend; it was like tasting sugar for the first time! Dating him was a real eye opener in many ways :) I wouldn't be anywhere as near as kinky if I had never dated him

Anyways, I think because the way I grew up, I'm a lot more sensitive to being touched and looked at compared to most people.

Plus, I think girls are given a lot more privacy then guys tend to get, so I think most girls wouldn't be as desensitized to having their bodies exposed to a stranger.

Thanks for sharing...it's funny how fear sometimes turns into a fetish :-)

If you could travel back in time, what would you do differently at this appointment?

I totally agree about the fear turning into a fetish thing; I think all of my fetishes originally started as a fear. I worry and play the fear over and over again in my head, turning it into an obsession. Then it's kind of like a defense mechanism that turns my obsessive fear into an erotic sensation. And once that happens; it's like my brain reprograms itself so my fear becomes manageable by accompanying it with mind numbing pleasure.
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If I could do it again, I'd probably do it the same because a pelvic exam while I was still a virgin would have been a bit traumatizing for me; just remembering the submissive feeling of exposing my breasts and having them felt up by that nurse who I met for the first time that day, was a very intense memory just by itself. I think it was a good introduction for me into submitting to the medical world. :)

How did that first exam compare with later exams you've had? Have you had one by a male doctor?

I'm glad she was so friendly and talkative; the lady doctor who did my first pelvic exam was a lot more cold and distant. That pelvic exam doctor was a bit weird, thinking back on it; she was super stand offish during the exam itself, but when she walked past me in the hallway later, she smiled at me like we were best friends.
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I was trembling almost the whole time I was on her table, so I was surprised that she chose to smile at me after it was all over. Although, her attitude helped to emphasize the humiliation and submission I felt towards her, which helped turn it into my most erotically intense exam ever! So I'm okay with her rather odd attitude while examining me. :)
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(I wrote about my first pelvic exam in a different story.)

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The only time I've had a male doctor examine me in any of my intimate places was my first pediatrician. I don't remember how old I was at the time, but I think fairly young. Maybe somewhere between the ages of 6 and 8? Any ways, it started off as a very normal exam that I would normally get when seeing him. Looking in my eyes, ears and throat. Listening to my heart beat, that typical kind of thing.
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At the end though, he did something he'd never done to me before. He undid my jeans and pulled them down while kneeling in front of me. He did it so fast, I was in shock. Why would he have pulled my jeans down? I stared into his smiling blue eyes in confusion, then looked down at myself. My jeans weren't all the way down, just to about mid thigh or so, but my pantie covered crotch was completely exposed to his view. I remember being really embarrassed that I was wearing panties decorated with some kind of cartoon character; I would have worn plain ones if I'd known anyone else but me was going to be seeing them.
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I didn't want the doctor to look at them, but I was in too much shock to protest his actions. I looked back up at him, confused and embarrassed. Still smiling at me, he said something like, "I'm just going to take a quick peak..." Then he pulled my panties down and starred at my naked and childishly bald crotch. I froze, unable to look at anything other than his graying head as he stared intensely at my bared private parts...
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Why? Why would he want to look at me there?
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He only looked for maybe a minute or so, but it felt a lot longer. Nodding in satisfaction, he then pulled my panties back up and re-zippered and buttoned my jeans for me.
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I didn't say anything for a long time after that. I remember wanting to ask my mom on the car ride home why the doctor had looked at me there, but I couldn't bring myself to ask; I was just too embarrassed. I hoped that she would explain without me having to ask (she was in the exam room and had seen the whole thing), but she was just as quiet as me.
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I thought about that incident a lot after it happened. I was a little embarrassed and a bit humiliated at being looked at like that, especially him seeing my cartoon panties. Him seeing those made me feel very childish and immature just on their own, but the way he had essentially ******** my naughty spot like I wasn't capable of dressing or undressing myself was the especially humiliating part.
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And the part I couldn't stop thinking about...
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I didn't appreciate it properly at the time, but I think I've developed a bit of a fetish for having my clothes removed from me while I remain passive; I don't think my fetish has any real official name though.... Maybe some subset enf? Or cmnf? I'm not sure. But I like playing naughty doctor now with a lover where I'm ******** by his hands, overruling my stammering protests that I can do it myself with smiling medical efficiency all my secret places are exposed and explored with cold metal instruments of domination....

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No, other than that very first doctor, I never had another male doctor do any intimate exams on me in real life. I've thought about it and fantasized about it, but I think it's one of those fantasies I'd rather keep as a fantasy or experience it in role play. If it was ever unavoidable though, it would probably be a good experience.