How Asperger's Affected My Life

I'm only fifteen and because of aspergers...


*I was alienated starting in the sixth grade.
 *People stole my drawings and ruined them.
 *People would steal my stuff to get on my nerves (someone stole my pencil case off a teacher's desk and dumped all the pencils out around the school.)
 *I was sexually harassed by younger students.
 *I was forced to write apology notes to people I beat up for sexually harassing me ("Feel free to continue whenever you feel like it," am I right? <.<)
 *People started a facebook group about "How the **** is she in accel. classes." (Ironically, this was made by someone who was not in accel. classes.)
 *I have horrible bouts of depression.
 *I have horrible bouts of insomnia.
 *I've pulled out sections of my hair while under stress (picking at the scalp)
 *People thought I was retarded all through middle school.
 *I got straight A's.
*Some kid spread rumors that I had autism (they said I was on the floor kicking my legs and screaming because some girl cussed me out during basketball).
*I beat that kid up.
*I did not get suspended because it was a football player (what football player's gonna admit he got beat up by a freshmen girl?)
*I've had horrible bouts of clenching my jaw so tightly it locked.
*People have asked me if I'm going to grow up to be an artist, because the possibility of me wanting to do anything else is nonexistent.
*I can't stop thinking about stupid things I said and what I should have said.
*I bite my nails.
*I'm a very angry person.
WickedJakyoku WickedJakyoku
13-15, F
3 Responses Mar 6, 2011

Well, I haven't been bullied in a while, and it's nothing that our consolers are going to fix. I was in a very negative mood when I wrote this, and I was just looking for things to complain about. Asperger's is no longer considered an autism label, and, as such, I'm no longer seen as being in special ed. At my new school, the people who are mean to most people have no credibility over someone who is not mean to most people. People are actually judging me by what I do rather than what teacher hangs over my shoulder like me. I don't believe aspergers itself has ruined anything, but the label has caused all sorts of trouble for me.<br />
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I don't think there's anything wrong with the condition, aside from the anxiety and OCD that come along with it, but the diagnosis itself is a lot of trouble, especially if the only "help" you receive for it is being taken out of art or music classes to sit in a room and do busywork.

I agree with "The Naked Poet". I been through all that except the sexual harassment. You need to talk to a school counselor about these bullies.

Hello, WJ. I found a lot of what you wrote here to be very familiar. I experienced similar things. OK... not sexual harrassment and not internet abuse, but just about everything else. It's not the condition that's horrible, though - it's peoples' responses to it.<br />
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I would be very interested to see if you ever write a similar posting about the ways in which the condition has affected you positively. I hope you write one.