Born to Be a *****

I'm really trying to work on this. I have had a terrible temper as a child and have grown to have anger issues as an adult.   
When people first meet me, they assume I'm a ***** (this is what I've been told). I feel I am truly not. I can be the most loving, loyal person in the world if you can overlook my irrational bursts that I have over the smallest things. Things such as: a double-parked car, a rude person, an innocent comment (that I take the wrong way). I am really trying to get this behavior under control but when I get angry- it's like I black out. I don't care how hurtful it is, I will say it. I hardly ever get physically violent but I know I am emotionally hurtful. I am married and adore my husband but I am so scared that he will leave me for my intolerable behavior. I have said some of the most hurtful things to him and have even taken things out on him that may have happened at work. I do not know how to control myself once I start getting angry. I have asked him if he wants me to go to counseling and he says no, but I know my behavior bothers him.
vanilla vanilla
26-30, F
Jul 2, 2007