My OCD started as a fear of wetting the bed when I was about 15 I think. I had a one off experience of wetting the bed when I was about 11 years old. My parents were extremely strict and they have admitted they probably went overboard on my toilet training although I have no direct memory of it. Hence I was terrified and very upset when I wet the bed this one time when I was 11.
Later as I hit puberty and life became more stressful I began to have an obsessive fear that I would wet the bed although I never did. I would then spend longer and longer in the toilet trying to make sure I had squeezed out every last drop and various counting rituals etc began to emerge as I struggled with the awful anxiety. My parents became very angry and my father would sometimes drag me out of the bathroom forcibly. I would then secretly try to pee into a cup or a bin in my bedroom until I felt it was safe to go to bed.
That was just the beginning............. But enough for now. Thanks for letting me share my experience.
Mandahugs Mandahugs
46-50, F
Aug 19, 2014