Can Someone Help?

I am writing in search of help, information, knowledge, or compassion.

My mother who is 58 had a stroke at the age of 47 due to her weight.  The stroke affected her brain, leaving her a little less able than before.  Since her stroke she has gained more weight and is unable to get around very well.  She has falled several times and cannot get back up - this has caused us to move her in with my sister.  We hoped that by doing this, she could participate in some social activities with the family and be a little more motivated and active and hopefully, essentially, happier.

I know she is severely depressed and has been for my entire life.  Her weight issues are a direct result of this depression.  Her stroke only intensifies the misunderstanding of healthy eating and excercise.  After researching Binge Eating Disorders, I do believe she may suffer from this.

We really want to help her.  We are afraid of hurting her feelings or sending her deeper into her depression.

How do we address this issue with her (given her inability to fully understand), and where do we start?  I know we cannot just "put her on a diet", as that would be taking her freedom.  However, we want her to be with us for many more years and are afraid of what this is doing to her health.  She is on many medications including blood thinners - and I know that you have to be careful and be monitored with weight loss.

She is physically unable at this point, due to her weight, to do an exercise regimen. 

So what I am asking is - do we address the depression first?  With meds? 

How do I help her tactfully?

helpmymom helpmymom
61-65, F
1 Response Mar 9, 2010

Buy 1 kg medium ground beef at the store. cook it at medium heat and let it release its own juice..dnt add anythign, water or grease.. after about 40 mins, drain the beef juice into a container and put in the fridge overnight. Next morning, take the fat la<x>yer, put it into a separate container and show it to your mum. Tell her that that's whats accumulating in her vessels from eating so much.. o and it helps to take a straw and shove some fat in it..tell her to blow air through the straw.. show her how difficult it is to remove it...<br />
And then tell her its up to her. no one can control it but the same person who has lost control.. tell her it will be her conscious choice.. all it takes is substitution and mental will!<br />
good luck