Ustbedwetting And Being Married With A Child

Hello.
I do not feel comfortable disucssing my condition with anyone, but i felt i could not handle the sneakeness anymore that was making me feel alone. I have wet the bed since my senior yr of highschool. Not every night not monthly , it just comes and goes but seems to be triggered by certain things. In high school i wore a diaper at times with the help and understang from my mother. She made me feel ok about it and would never tell a soul. After i graduated went to college for a year and just had a few epsiodes, but never wore protection in a dorm room with my best friend too embarassing. I thought i would never wet the bed again but began to abuse alcohol. and at one poing durgs. After using drugs i slept for longer hrs at a time and would almost pee the bed. I had to but diapers in decreet way away from my home cause was afraid of seeing someone and having them think i have a diaper fetish or something. I would get so nervous when i would buy them i prob looked like friek who people procieve as a adult baby want a be. I started dating a girl who knew me before and my thought was i better let her know i wet the bed sometimes in case she woke up in being wet, embarassed and prob think im a wierdo and not want to continue the relationship. So i came out and said the second night that I wet the bed at times and to not have to wash me sheets every night i am in a protection adult diaper when im in bed. She did not say anything and was making me feel ok about it. it became a matter of us making jokes about it and it was like our little secret, But i became close with her family and stayed there alot. Her mother to my supprise came to me with the supplies that i was using and told me she would help out any way needed and made me feel like they were just underware. But after a year and a half she went to college and we not able to make it work. I needed the protection after that for about 2 months after that/drinking accidents mostly! but I seemed to not have a bed wet problem for a good while. Then i met my wife of now and she is 5 yrs older. I knew i should have told her but I really did like her and thought she being older and mature she would not accept me for the fact that i might have the bedwetting occur again and need adult products. I joked with her in the past about wearing a diaper when i was heavly drinking and she was discusted and thought it was odd talking about putting on something a "baby or older person wears". Well to get to the bulk of the story and problem i went thur a durg period of months straight using a very bad and dangerous drug. I did not think I would ever wet the bed while I was using. But after a month intto the drug use I began to sweat very bad and would wake up just soaked like i just took a shower. Well part of that was urine. Thought it was a fluke but it began again and was peeing my self at least 1 to 2 times a week. So I simply and decretly bought and hid adult diapers so my wife would not find wet spots on the bed or couch.. Well 2 weeks ago I quit using drugs went to the doctor and got on anti depresent meds. I never felt better after a week until one night i awoke to my catching myself dreaming waking up and realized i was peeing in bed. I jumped out of bed just in time and was thinking maybe a one time deal. Not the case i wet the bed 8 nights in a row. So the other day i sent a email to my wife explsng all of my story just like this and to my ammasement she understood. But I was nervous talking about products and if she would buy them for me. She did not understand why i get nervous buying them. I live in a town of about 60,000 pop and have a small business with my company logo on the truck. Just about everyone in town has seen my truck abound a time or two. So i told her that i prob needed a max prot diaper cause some will leak as expericned in the past. Which does not sound normal when talking about what diaper i need at night. I had a feeling she might not feel as ok as she seemed. So the next day i told her that i would need *** just to tape them cause its hard for me to do when I weigh 250lbs. She said it would be wierd seening me in a diaper. So i told her I dont feel good wearing aboud her and our daughter. Long 2 days later we are really stressed out and i have a hard time knowing i need to tell a doctor that i pee in bed and my wife buys me diapers. I am very self worry and i simply get anxiety alot since i told her. I know i need adult protetion at night i just wish i felt more comfortable about it. What shoud I do from here on out so I dont feel like a baby or a nussance to my wife. I do not want to wear another diaper again. but will prob have to for a while until i figure out why i am wetting the bed again. Please any advise is good advise.
nebby50 nebby50
31-35, M
4 Responses May 15, 2012

One thing i did advise a urilogist thru a message. I told him everything and he had various questions. One of which is the issue may be physogal or a combination of both. I was not expecting him to ask about me about infilasm, and if I understood the meaning. I told him yes because of research in the past. He said he is not someone to diagnoss that type of why the wetting occurs, but asked one question. Do I or have I had dreams of going to pee and or dreaming of wearing a diaper or being diapered. I told him yes quite a bit. I told him when I wore protection several years ago and suddenly quit wearing I almost felt naked. And felt like I was more comfortable when i had them on in bed. It sounds wierd and i hate even thinking about it because i am not a so called adult baby that likes to be diapered and babyed by someone. I think that is disturbed, He said that it could be that people when young experince a issue and when in a baby like situation they feel at ease. I guess i did feel comfortable when wearing after a while but my ex made me feel comfortable. I am confused but I would feel like some what of a friek if a counsler told me they think i have dreams cause I like to regress when i was a baby. I dont even like thinking about it. Very wierd and not approaite in my books. I hate the fact that I wet the bed and my wife is buying adult diapers for protection. Wow very wierd saying that. I hope this goes away.

Thank you for the well needed feedback. One of the things i worry about is the stigma of using diapers to not ruin the bed and get my wife wet and angry. I do not know why i get all worked up about using a product but even she said it would be wierd to see me in something that resembles a baby. Maybe she thinks she will think of me differently even after i get med treatment. People proviece things differently and i think of using adult diapers as something that a male of my age should not use. I have a hard time even calling a pharmacy and asking them if they can be picked up in the drive thru. Maybe as time goes on alittle bit (hopefully not too long) that i will feel more comfortable using protection and she might as well. I do need help getting the brief to fit snug to where it works to the abiliy it is supposed to. And I think my wife feels wierd about that and doesnt understand. I have told her that the way my body is formed and when laying there to reach and put in nessary place is a struggle. Sometimes i think i have it right and it is lose. Then you try again and by then you need a new one cause the tapes are not sticking. Embarassing and fructrating. When I started in high school i did need asistance from my mother, and when i wore for a period of time with my ex i was 70 lbs lighter and were very easy to attach the right way. I feel wierd asking her to help, but i told her she would only just tape them snug so the bed and matress would not get wet and stain. I also feel like this has kindof taken over my life cause im affraid of what my wife thinks of me. And the fact that I know when i lay down in bed there is a possibility that it can happen. Again thank you for the feed back. Do you kindof understand where im coming from and how I feel.

Nobody stresses about needing glasses to see...or a hearing aid. This is no different. It's just something that you need to make your life better and more comfortable. it should be a source of comfort, not something that is giving you even more stress. It sounds like your wife is accepting of the situation, so just "do what you gotta do".

I am in them 24/7 because I went through a lot of sexual abuse when I was a child and teen and the damage to my bladder is so I have to wear them but it only really started being a problem three yrs ago and like you didn't want to tell no one about it cause I thought it would out me from a lot of thing I like to do with family,I finally told her like you and have talked to a doc but mine is stress and damage from abuse yours may be stress and a need for some bladder muscle meds to help you control the leaking at night and the urges in the day. I am here if you need to talk or want help but I will not force you to talk about it if you don't want to.just letting you know you are not alone in this.