This human being I called my "mother" is not what she appears to be; motherly, caring, quiet, sweet & innocent. Here's how I found out

I got married few months ago, husband and I stayed at my parents house for about 5 months. Then moved to my husband's after. My mother is unhappy about the move. She complained to my sister about how upset she is that I'm gone (and my sister told me all about it) and I acknowledge she's probably experiencing empty nest syndrome.

A month later, her complaints escalated. She started saying things like I'm a selfish daughter cause I didn't give her any money (my parents are not poor btw), that i am now arrogant cause I married a rich man, that I purposely forgot my mother now that i'm rich.

FYI, my husband and I drop by my parents house occasionally. The last time I was there was last week, I stayed for about an hour talking to my sister about what my mother been talking behind my back. Apparently my mother's jealous of my in-laws wealth. She kept complaining about me not staying at my parents house. She hated my husband now & blames him for not allowing me to stay with her (which is not true), she expressed her jealousy on & on again about me HAVING MY OWN LIFE.

This "mother" of mine plays the victim role. Blames me for her sorrows, accusing me of abandoning my own family when all I do is just.. Concentrating on husband & pregnancy. And whats sad is, she never asked how I'm doing, hows the pregnancy going etcetc because she's too busy being the "victim". Funny thing is, she never said all these things to me. When i come home, she puts on this fake smile & pretends to be a good mom. Sometimes she ignores me and gave me angry looks but never said a word.

She expects me to have some sort of psychic ability, to be able to read her mind! FYI, its not like we didn't give her anything. My husband gave her some pocket money 2 months ago to show her his gratefulness for letting us stay there. He paid and is still paying their internet bill but my mother showed no appreciation.

Now, all she talks about is about my ungrateful behavior. She even said that i am no longer her daughter and I am not welcomed. why? All because I MOVED out and have my OWN LIFE.

I understand that mothers can be clingy, she probably wanted My attention, she probably is jealous that I've given my attention to my new family and my coming baby. I assume she felt lonely and probably miss having me around the house.. But i think it is cruel to say all those things about me & my husband. I feel betrayed that she's been bad mouthing me all this time.

Any thoughts?
sydnew sydnew
26-30, F
1 Response Aug 16, 2014

It`s obviouse I have maternal problems.......But, all I can say to you is once you decide to make a life for yourself, getting married, then that life is your most important. In twenty or so years you may have a grown-up little girl and you will join the rest of us that break our hearts when a child leaves the "nest".That is all you`ve done. You haven`t left the family just the center point of it has moved a tad for you and your partner. You and he now have a short time in which to have a lot of fun, grasp it. Once you become 3,4,5,6,or whatever then the fun you have is different and balancing life becomes bl<x>inkin hard work, albeit rewarding, LIVE.