So My Ldr Failed 2 Months Premature.

In July last year I met an absolutely beautiful Italian girl with a stunning personality and a love for life, who was on a working holiday in New Zealand. I hit it off with this girl and things were wonderful, when she left we kept in contact.

We were spending insane amounts of time and money keeping in contact (phone calls, video calls) and made plans for to return to New Zealand and live together, she would often talk of having children and getting married in 2009. Her re-arrival date was supposed to be in December '08.

In August this year the contact stopped abruptly - from hot to cold, everything to nothing. In my mind I already knew what happened, though she wouldn't admit it and just plain ignored everything I wrote to her.

She later admitted she was beginning to fall in love with some stud in her home country she'd secretly liked for years, who'd approached her multiple times.

Now this I can't blame her for - I felt betrayed, especially as she had been too cowardly to tell me and left me in limbo for weeks. What I can blame her for is how she played me over the weeks to come. Constantly giving me forms of hope - the new relationship wasn't working out, the guy's an absolute jerk, you're such such a great guy, etc. All the while still avoiding me, for the most part.

This got out of control just last week when she told me straight up that she'd had it with him and wanted to return here to be with me in December (original ETA). She set up a video call, took off her clothes and told me nothing had changed and she'd made a huge mistake. I told her I didn't believe her, but I'd give her another chance to prove herself. Well, that was 5 days ago. For the past 2 days she's suddenly "disappeared" again.

Trick me once, shame on you.

Trick me twice, shame on me...

constructivecynicism constructivecynicism
5 Responses Sep 28, 2008

ldr are all about trust. I would now I was in one and the guy went from hot to cold and we had been together for a year and a half. You cannot obsess over her or get back together, you are only there when all else fails in her hometown. good luck finding a real girl.

Oh my gosh, I understand. It's really hard when the person you care for isn't sure what they want. I think it's then our jobs to keep ourselves out of the equation. They don't deserve us if they'd break it off with us, I know because my bf kept going back and forth with deciding whether he wanted to be with me or not. It really hurt my heart going back and forth and damaged the trust in our relationship. If I ever go back it will be because I really want to go back and he will have to be sure that's what he wants too. I'm not a yo yo but I admit mine really is what I've always wanted in a mate so it's not black and white for me. good luck!

3 years ago now. I still hear from her occasionally, the time between contact grows longer each time, though. She will always be the most beautiful girl I dated. She was so far out of my league.

her actions were extremely low towards u. my life experiences have lead me to not expect much of people who aren't immediate family or life long friends, and i came to terms with that because i think that those people aren't owing of it in contrast to close family and close friends. However, still, i know, there has to be a certain level of unselfishness, regard and human decency from these people.

Yeah, she tried to contact me a few times since - she only makes me sad though. She got pregnant to said man, had the child and is engaged to him. She had the nerve to tell me she wants to come here and bring up the child. <br />
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No thanks...