Trying To Move Foreward

I also have been cheated on and it's the hardest thing I have dealt with, but iam still here and do wonder why.i know he doesn't deserve me yet I make excuses as to why I can't leave,he is out of town working and I do a lot of thinking of how iam going to talk to him when he comes home,then he comes home and I lose my words.i have trouble explaining myself,and of course he always turns it around that iam just looking for problems.we have been married 36 yrs and communication has never been very good,I know he had kept in contact with this lady as she lives out of state and meet online 13 yrs ago..he now has put a password on cell phone so I cant see....I need to talk to him has to why if he has nothing to hide he would put a pass code on.i would like to see the billing statement and see for myself maybe then It will help me move foreward...he has lied so much that even if he did tell me the truth I dont know if I would believe why do I stay in this marriage with no trust and a lot of lies,,,?maybe some day I can answer that,,right now I feel sooooo lonely .

Shortcut2u2003 Shortcut2u2003
4 Responses May 12, 2012

I feel your pain. My husband feels a lot of guilt, but his guiltiness only makes me feel sick. I am also interested in your present situation. How r things going? How r u coping?

Well I take 1day at a time.and it's always on my mine because he hides things from me like email passwords and phone pass codes so I cant see what's going on,,I have been wanting to talk to him for months and he always turns it around on me that I don't thrust him,and I don't! He doesn't see that if he wouldn't hide things maybe I could thrust him,,but things have
Been like this for years..maybe soon I will talk to him and if he gets mad oh well..I didn't cheat he did,I have found many things on his emails over the years but he always had an excuse..or it's nothing for me to worry about..I feel sorry for people that have To go through this,,it's hard to think that someone u love would put u through this..and seen to have no regrets...he went to the store so iam able to write He is retired and always home,,,I still work and do wonder what he does all day,I do try not to think bad thoughts all day,,what keeps me. Going I have 2. Wonderful daughters. And 1 is having a baby I december..and I really excited about first grandchild. Well thanks for responding to my letter and hope to talk to u again,thanks again for listening...hope Your situation get better.

My heart goes out to you ! I recently learned of my husbands 2 yr affair, we have been married 17 yrs and the betrayal is not an easy pill to swallow! I feel like I am not good enough and he just acts like it was no big deal ! Please know you are in my thoughts ! This is one of the toughest things I have had to deal with in my life, and it is not easy I struggle daily with feelings and questions !

Thanks for your comment,,at least your husband is sorry .as for mine I don't think so ,or he wouldn't keep doing things to hurt me,it's so hard to move on when you have been with the same person for 36 yrs,I wish I had the nerve to pack my stuff and head out the door,I do plan to talk to him when he gets home,maybe next week,it will probably not do much good except to get things of my chest,it's easy to write now with him not being here,

I feel so bad for you. I have also been betrayed. It was alot of years ago, but the hurt never goes away. I can not help but think about it. It helps when I keep busy, I have gotten my own life and hobbies so it is easier knowing that when I finally have had enough, I can take care of myself. I know that my husband is sorry and he does go out of his way to be kind to me. But the fact still remains that I do not feel that I am good enough for him.