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My Ex (a.k.a The Bastard) And His Best (female) Friend (a.k.a. The *****)......

I really do not understand why society accepts these three's a crowd type relationships.

Whatever happened to a relationship being between two people? Why do relationships have third parties, sometimes more, dictating to them everything?

Why do people assume that it's always the woman in the relationship who objects to the ***** groping her partner as being the one who's a jealous ***** with issues.

I'm not immature when I say keep your hands off my man *****. Yet I'm viewed as the guilty party because they play the victim and gain public sympathy by conjuring up bull sh!t and making out they did no wrong.

I didn't realise that the only way some ******* out there seem to get the ******* msg is if another woman pees a fucken line around her man to mark her territory.

Hate those ******* who seize any opportunity to get with your man! If you go to the toilet 9 times out of 10 some slag is trying to show your man their invisible nipple ring or whatever when you return.

Some of the women of today make me smh in wonder. They wear skirts the size of belts and less clothes than a prostitute then throw themselves at men, not even caring that they may be taken.

I do have an experience to share, so I shall get to it:

My ex fiancé had a female friend who he'd been close to for many many years. He spoke so highly of her I thought they were related or something. She wasn't much better. She would be so affectionate with him it made me feel like the third wheel to my OWN RELATIONSHIP!

She'd come up behind him and wrap her arms around his waist when we were discussing private things and she'd rub herself up against him (like her boobs would mash into his chest and crotch would rub against his groin for way too long than was acceptable) to a point that it felt like she was baiting me into a corner so she could play the victim and I was the villain, jealous and pathetic. So instead I'd bite my tongue.

She seemed to love every moment. One time we were at the beach and I'd gotten him to rub some lotion on me and she then insisted after he'd done my body to do hers. She ignored me when I offered, stating loudly that no men wanted her, that she felt so neglected and unloved (cue violins) and would make little moans when she was getting the lotion rubbed into her that I thought were very inappropriate, as I didn't carry on like that.

I tried really hard to make it as friendly as I could between us, as I'd poured my heart and soul into that relationship I really did and I didn't want any bad blood between myself and anyone on his side. If only I'd known ;C

She obviously pretended to be thrilled about our engagement. She told me that she'd helped him to pick out the ring and everything. He's called her before his parents, that's how close they were. When I saw her later that week she even accepted one of the smokes I offered her, as she normally just ignored me and asked to bum one of the bastard's. she told me that we had to go wedding shopping and that as maid of honour she would look amazing in pink, her favourite colour. I politely told her that I'd already chosen my bridesmaids and she was upset to hear that she wasn't a part of it. I apologised and tried to explain to her that it wasn't going to be a massive lavish wedding or whatever as we really couldn't afford it. She seemed to get really ****** then and said to me frostily that I didn't have to lie and that if I was that threatened by her that I should just tell her. I told her that I wasn't lying and I just wanted to be her friend and she said that it was obvious that I was threatened by her because she had such a strong bond with my fiancé. My face must've given away my thoughts or something because she started getting really mad then and saying that all the females in her group hated me and all the males thought I was a tease. I got ****** back at her, swore at her and told her to just go **** herself. I stormed off and she must've immediately rang my fiancé because he sent me 9 voicemails telling me that she was feeling very scared to go near me as I'd just lashed out at her and she was concerned that the stress of all the planning was getting to me. He told me that he was worried that I was getting stressed as well and that I was looking too gaunt (?!?!?) and he questioned whether it not I was truly ready. I can't believe my next actions but I fell right into her ******* web and rang him back and started getting all hysterical saying that I hadn't done anything wrong and that she had said all the nasty **** to me and he told me that he didn't think that she would've meant it like that and that none of his friends had said anything negative to him about me, it had all been positive.
So I took all that on board and went with him that weekend to a pool/BBQ party thrown in our honour by his friends. I wished I'd had some of my mates there as all his female friends (who were all HER friends as well, school mates, netball buddies, clubbing mates etc) ignored me. They snubbed me so much that I found myself standing alone holding a cruiser and a cigarette and texting my friends. One of her best friends came up to me and pretended to care, saying ooh who are you sending love msgs to? I smiled at her and told her that I was texting my best friend telling her what an amazing party I was at. She gave me a smirk and then went back over to the tables where the ***** was sitting and they both started whispering and looking right at me, so it wasn't half obvious and one of their other mates looked over at me, scowled and then looked back at them and shook her head. So yeah, not exactly a warm welcoming committee..,.

My fiancé (the bastard) came up and put his arms around my waist. I laughed and he said what are you doing over here gorgeous? I told him that I had tried so hard to involve myself and be sociable but going on the fact that I hadn't gone to any of the same schools as them or known the same circles, I was feeling a bit snubbed, to say the least. My fiancé took me by the hand and we stood over by the BBQ where his mates were and some of their girlfriends and he started nuzzling my neck. I was just about to give him a kiss when his ***** yelled out "Get a room already" to which some of the group laughed. I rolled my eyes and turned around and looked her straight in the eye and said "But then you couldn't watch then, could you, *****?" The guys all roared with laughter and wolf whistled at me. I blushed, not meaning to say what is said, hating the fact that I'd let her get to me and make a fool of myself like that. She slammed her hand down on the table which made the whole group fall silent and stare at her. She pointed her finger at me. She looked like a raging psychopath. My fiancé pulled me away and shot her a look that must've meant business because all she said was "****, you'd better-" and then shut her mouth.
My fiancé stormed out to the car with me. I angrily sat in the passenger seat and stared stonily out the window. He got in the drivers seat and started the car. We were about to drive away when his ***** and two if her friends came barrelling out almost getting hit (pity) and they started banging on the bonnet of the car. I locked my doors on my side and gave the ***** the finger. She stormed over to his side and started whining that it was impossible to keep up any pretence of civility with me (?!?!) as I was obviously a jealous overly possessive *****! My fiancé yelled at her to watch her mouth and that the ***** had totally disrespected me in front of everyone and that she owed me an apology. When she stood there staring me down he said that she had to say sorry or he wouldn't contact her for a while. She banged her fist on his window frame and said "That ***** should apologise first! She insulted me!" I leaned across and yelled in her face "***** your ******* ugly face insults me, but you don't hear me complaining!" To which she tried to grab at me and my fiancé grabbed her hands and pushed them against the horn. He attempted to roll forward but she screamed and claimed he'd ran over her foot with the vehicle (oh whateverrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!) and she would sue him and me for all the medical bills. Her friends came up to the car, calling me a **** and a ***** and helped her "limp" away back to the house. She changed her foot twice but my fiancé fell for it. He dashed over and assisted her inside, leaving me alone in the car. I got out my phone and called my best mate and told her about everything that had happened. She asked me if I wanted her to come pick me up. I told her I should be fine. She told me that she'd never liked that two faced *****, saying that if she's going to be so ******* two faced to at least make one of them pretty. I laughed at that and let her go. I looked at the clock. Where the **** was he? I took the keys out of the ignition wound up the windows and locked the doors. A few of the people must've left while I'd been on the phone as there was only a handful of people left. They were all sitting around the corner of the table and only one of the younger guys responded when I asked where my fiancé was. So he was seeing to her wound was he? I stormed inside the house. There was a couple in the lounge playing video games. I didn't even bother asking them as the female was the best friend if the ***** and she seemed to smirk at me over the game control and follow me with evil eyes. I walked towards the laundry, as that was the nearest room to the lounge but it was empty. As was the kitchen. The bathroom door was locked. I jiggled the handle and heard the ***** gasp. I heard scrambling and then the door flew open and my fiancé stood there with his hair all messed up and lipstick on his cheek and jaw. She had the straps of her bikini top off like she'd just put it on in the dark and her shorts were on backwards. I whirled around and blindly ran back to the car. Don't ask me how I got there and don't ask me how I even drove I was crying so hard. I remember seeing my fiancé's face as he tried call out to me to stop from the front lawn but I didn't. I didn't want to hear any of his bullshit explanations like how he was just playing doctor and the ***** had asked for an internal or whatever.
I don't know how I didn't die, as I was so blinded by my tears. I drove all the way to the beach and just sat and looked out at the ocean. I remember asking the sea why? Why? Why?!?!? I wasn't a bad person. I would never do what as happening to me to anyone else so why was it happening to me?!?!? It just wasn't fair!!!!!

I didn't see my fiancé for 3 whole weeks after that. I also found out I was pregnant as well in that time which is why I guess I wound up contacting him again. He was shocked at first then excited. I was around 2 months pregnant and I remember seeing the ultrasound photo which I still have today. In fact, whenever I'm really low, I take out my ultrasound photos of my baby girl and bawl my eyes out. I lost my baby girl at just over 4 and a half months. I can't even describe to you how empty I feel to this day. I feel as though she was the closest I've ever been to anyone. I remember one of my friends nonna's giving me some knitted booties when she'd heard the good news. I have them stored with the ultrasound photos :'( I just wish I could've done more. To have more memories of her. When I ended it with my ex, after finding him and the ***** at the house my fiance and I lived in together, ******* in the bathtub, (I took out my anger on their faces) I decided to remember my daughter with a tattoo. My ex had not been very consoling during my grief, so I'd gone into a bubble, not even so much as daring to breathe in his direction. He'd say **** about me not eating enough or that I was looking very thin and gaunt and I'd just go even worse and not want to even look at food. The smell of food made me nauseous and he started calling me up about my smoking. It was like he was a prison guard and I was the prisoner. I felt so alone. I knew something was up with them as well because they were just being too weird for words, so when I discovered that I was a tiny bit relieved and so glad I had my best friend and her cousin there as they were able to be witnesses so the ***** and bastard couldn't turn around and say I was delusional or whatever.
So while there are parts of the relationship I do miss, I would never ever want to go back to any of that **** EVER EVER EVER AGAIN!!! I am so glad to be free and enjoy being happy.
I recently heard that they were expecting themselves, as she of course didn't mind being sloppy seconds, being the slag that she is, and she even actually wrote it up on her Facebook status and about me section on her page that after months of trying and trying and ******* and trying they were finally WITH CHILD and she deliberately made her page all public so it'd get back to me the heartless ***** so in response I'd like to say to her "Congratulations ****! I hope you and my ex **** of a ***** have a short pathetic life together where karma gets you at every ******* corner you turn and that you both gain weight like the feral heifer's you are. I hope you both die you ******* cheating scum and that you end up at each others throats. I ******* hate you both so ******* much!! I hope your kid finds out just how much of a dirty filthy ***** it's mother is and how gutless and ****** its dumb ***** of a father is. I hope you don't expect any sweetness from me ******* because you ain't getting ****!!! So **** you and I hope you both rot in hell forever!!!!!!!!"

Grrrr that felt soooooooooo GOOD!!!
Sorry I swore & wrote so much!!
M3rmaid M3rmaid 26-30, F 18 Responses Oct 11, 2012

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i needed to read this. I know it old as hell but I ******* needed to read it. I hope you are doing better now.

very intense indeed....sorry you had to experience all that

just throw tht A** out n start afreash. no need to think bout past

**** intense story
i dont know what to say
just scream out loud

So you were going to have a child with a man who puts you into this type of situation? You're not very bright, are you?

Shyt, I didn't know this 'Triangle' bullshit happened more often... which makes me sad, angry, and just disappointed all at the same time.

But for real, you did what you could. You've probably said this yourself (Hell, I know I have said to myself lots of times) but it is not your fault. Yeah, that female-person, she is definitely at fault for not respecting your relationship with your fiancé at the time, however, for him to allow her advances to continue on like that?

I know that one. You feel so pissed off at the offending party, at the person who became the 'Third' point in the relationship and you are like, 'The ****, dude? Have some ******* Respect!' but then... you realize that the other person is just as guilty, even more so, for allowing it to continue.

You've lost a bit, and I'm sorry for your loss, but good riddance to him. Just live the best Life you can now and well... hopefully, that is what you are doing right now.

Are the pheromones that attracted you to the cheating partner the very same ones pulling in the "*****" My goodness you make it seem all the "*******" are dressed as if they are on the way to a performance of the Rocky Horror show :)

What are the things in common about these guys giving priority to the other woman?

Are they or were they particularly handsome husbands, sexually too demanding of you, losing warmth and affection,

In no way I am suggesting you are at fault as even the nicest fellas can be truly horrendous. Worst example I can think of is the son of very good friends who is handsome and a delightful companion both socially and in sporting activities. We were on holiday just with his parents who were new grandparents.. At midnight there was distressed wailing from an hysteric grandmother. The "bastard" was separating from his wife because he no longer found her attractive and had a new woman. (IMHO a rather drab ordinary lass rather than the pretty assertive privately educated wife he had married) Grandmother was having to deal with a distressed daughter-in- law who she had taken into taken into the family with a loving heart.

Phew a lesson in raw anger and hatred!
I have only felt such anger towards one of my brother in laws who as a tall teenager had tried to have penetrative sex with my dear wife when she was a tot of four
It took several decades until the truth was revealed and I then had an understanding of why full sex was so difficult in the early years of marriage.
He would even admit or apologise for what had happened but I knew it was absolutely true as what happened was clearly seen in the eyes of a little girl and not an adult. Even worst that the family that should have supported her then refused to face up to the truth all those years later
Once this ghost was in the open it was possible to begin a new life.
Do you find it strange that she should ask my consent to visit Germany to see a dentist? Well the dentist was a nice fella we met on holiday and obviously liked my wife.
Well I could have said no. When I said yes I had a delighted teenage on my hands - a girl who had missed out on relationships as a result of abuse.
We love each other so much and that love is on a much higher plain than real life or virtual life relationships that have a sexual aspect

Maybe I am a "cold fish" and you have enlightened me as to what a truly passionate woman or man should feel

Maybe I could get an invite to join this man hating circle if I say how lovely you all are and what awful partners you have picked :)

*****hugs******

Well, good for her, when she returned from Germany there was evidence of having quite a rough time! So I am going to join your cheated upon group because of the cheating brother who abused my child wife and the German dentist and his sexual skills. Did you know that many abused women have fear of allowing dentists to penetrate their mouths?

I'm dealing with my own manwhore of a husband, so I kind of know how you feel. I've not caught him and her together physically, but I've already seen what they do online. All their so called "roleplay", playing out fantasies with each other. But oh, it's all "fake and not real" and I'm not supposed to be upset by that at all. I'm being "jealous, possessive and psychotic"

GET REAL. I truly and honestly would not be surprised if they HAVE had sex, heck I'm almost waiting for him to finally confess it. I've always had a strong intuition, and my "moments of suspicion" have been justified and correct about 99% of the time.

And considering I've caught him in the past "playing" online, AND having been with him so long I know when he's up to something without words, I've got every right to be suspicious of him.

The sad thing? He's went from someone who loves him but calls him on his **** to some little immature **** who acts like a lovesick highschool girl. I don't really harbor resentment towards her anymore, it's been replaced with pity and a smirk, and the thought that he's going to screw her over just like he did me. Him? He'll just continue down his sad and dark little abyss.




(Sorry, that got a little long lol)

Nah you're all good babe. Grr men like that **** me off! How totally disrespectful for you, you don't deserve that babe ;C screw him and just say the word babe and I'll push him down that abyss for you ;9

Woohoo! In fact, let's just push all men like that down there. At least we'll be doing the world a favor! ;)

Hehehehe ;9 now you're speaking my language lol ;9

Your ex is seriously screwed up!I hope you can be happy again.You don`t deserve this bullshyt!

Naww thanks beautiful ;9

Welcome, gorgeous, actually i think we both have alot in common after reading your stories >_<.

Personality wise.

Awww absolutely gorgeous ;9

Do feel free to message me when you want to find someone to talk to :).

Thanks babe and you too ;9

3 More Responses

I with you! Every word of it!

I'm going through one of these triangle things right now, and it's effing killing me!

Brilliantly written, by the way! :o)

Thanks honey and I'm sorry to hear that :(

Wow. It never ceases to amaze me of how childish a manwhore and **** can be. And to know you've lost your angel and they're rubbing it in your face with their own, sometimes, I am so glad I don't talk to anyone, nor trust them. If you love someone, for one, you don't let girl or guy touch you like that. But, as for you, you were way too good for him. Maybe once he matures he'll realize what he's done and feel stupid for it. Then again, boys like that never learn anything. She'll end up doing him the same way he did you. They always do. Then, you have your giggle or laugh and tell him, "Can't have your cake and eat it, too." I'm sorry you went through that though. But I'll be honest with you, the way I am, I would have ditched him the first time he let her touch him like that, because that was the first and most important warning that the huzzy was trouble, and the guy was her tag along. Hugs your way, hun.

Thanks babe, I guess I only went back cos I found out I was pregnant and thought that was the bandaid solution to all our relationship problems. I learned the hard way you can't fix an already broken relationship and I guess that's why even though it kills me to even think it let alone write it, my baby chose not to be a part of a false bs relationship because that's all it was in the end and I was the delusional dumb arse who didn't see it :( thanks though babe xoxoxo

Aww. You shouldn't take it that way, hun. Maybe it's a way for God giving you your own guardian angel to carry with you in your heart..? I'm just sorry you had to experience it in the way you are. I believe everything happens for a reason, and God only lets you learn it or know it when He believes you're ready.

Aww that is very beautiful thank you sweets I never looked at it that way ;9

She took your man because shes jealous of you...and hes a dumbass and it was easy for her to do.
find yourself a good man..who can spot these ****** a mile away.

Thanks babe ;9 you are gorgeous ;D

You are very courageous and you have my respect. When I met my wife I had such a friend and I really enjoyed being with her. When I decided to marry someone else I had to make a choice. It was a difficult choice to be sure, but in marriage my commitment to my wife is that she is safe with me and she would not feel safe as long as I had a relationship with my friend. I gave up my friendship and committed to my wife.

So, there are still some whose heart is true. I am sorry that you had to go through all that. You are very strong though, and I think you will be alright.

Naww thanks babe that's because you're a real man and my ex was just a puppet for her :(

I really like that you chose ur wife.over some "chick' friend...makes me feel good that I wasn't asking my bf too much when I made him chose me or his friend that was a female. I just. Couldn't stand her always around.me n her were friends too but she ended.up making a new.friend n started talking****so I made him chose because I only knew what other intentions she had

I lost a one to a freind so i got even with alittle help i asked a girl he was hot for to help she was happy to help since he was a cheater and all she had to do is every now and then is drop little hints that me and her had been doing things you know the things he wish he could get? And she would drop hints that he could get in on it when she was around so now they fight thinking he is cheating and he trying to get back with me that was 19 years ago to this day he regrets cheating on me but i dont cuz i have been with his ex best freind for 19 years married for 17 so im glad cuz i got my soul mate and he got a life of his girl thinking he a cheater so just remind her he was cheating on you when w

I like the sounds of that! Thank you so much for reading all that and good on you for having a 19 yr relationship with his ex best friend, that would've hurt him a lot lol

OMG, at first I began to chuckle, then laugh, then proud your ex took up for you, then sad when you saw them together in the bathroom...it's just too bad some women can't find a man w/o regard for whom he's attached to...some women are ruthless and cold...that doesn't go away...and your **** of a ***** ex will see her true colors after the novelty of sex wears off...He will suffer like you don't know...

I know it must've ripped your heart out to experience that, however Not if, but when you fall in love again, it will be stronger than ever....

I lost my first son to spinal meningitis...he was a premature birth and his little body couldn't fight off the infection....he lived 8 days...so I feel your pain my love....I'm so honored to have met you...and just reading your story makes feel close to you though we live across teh oceans....

Greg xxx

Aww I'm so sorry to hear about your loss honey that's awful :'C thank you so much for reading my manifesto whatever rofl I just got lost writing in it, then when I posted it I was like O.O at how long it was and I thought omfg no one is going to have the time to read all this then I just thought ah well at least I vented and wow it felt good ;9 take care sexy ;9

No need to be sorry for the swearing, or the long story. I am sorry, really soorry, you lost the baby girl.
But I am glad you got the chance to see your fiancé for what is, before you two tied the knot.
Hugs

Naww thanks honey and thank you so much for the kind words xoxo

I feel like i need to swear like that. Least you found out he was scum before you got married.

Thanks honey ;9 that's absolutely right xoxo