If It Can Happen To Me It Can To Anyone......Long story short.... I found out in May my husband of 29 years had been having over a year long affair with the hairdresser in the space that my husband rents to her BESIDE his office!!!! She was separated and also 9yrs younger than him. We separated went to counseling over 3 months and I let him move back in September 1. He started acting distant end of October into December. I finally asked him why he acted so miserable? The next question I had for him was have you spoken to or seen her? Our counselor told us he was to completely cut off contact with her and if there were ANY he was to come to me and tell me immediately! First of all he said he felt like he was in a prison (not true!) And yes she called him on his cell phone from a number he didn't recognize( she keeps changing her cell phone number). He
should of hung up the phone immediately when he heard her voice. He has a secretary that can handle "fix it" issues with her shop. He also said he came into his office one Monday morning ( her day off) and when he left his office she was sitting outside her shop. He said she only asked how was yours Christmas? I'm sure there was more conversation. Dec 31st we separated again. I told him I would not call him or look for him anymore. He agreed and said he would keep in touch. We have talked several times but just about da-day stuff. Every time I say we NEED to talk. He says he'll call but he has avoided any conversation about our seperation and which direction we..I will go! Why does he hold all the power and leave me in limbo. Somehow I feel he is trying to punish me for his mistakes. Oh yeah...he had an affair(sex) a couple of times with his former secretary about 12 yrs ago. I got him to finally confess to this which i suspected for years but repressed because I couldn't face itso I didn't dig to find out....just gut feeling. My 3 daughters were small at the time. Please welcome me to your group and any advice would be great. My heart continues to ache!