I meet him when I was 17 we went to different schools. My friend introduce us and he seem like a great guy. Within first year he begin to pusher me and I just told myself he just loved me that why. You see my whole life I was use to being hit scream at. My father wasn't good guy and he had left my life when I was 16. So I was use to being treated like I didn't matter. Year into the relationship everyone thought things were great but deep down I was breaking and being broke. He would come home and yell at me and then he started to hit me. One day my mom came over to help me pack. I was 20 at the time and we were moving. My mom found a hole in wall where he was so mad he hit the wall. She begin to ask questions and like he had told me I lied through my teeth though she never believed it. By time I turn 21 he had started drinking and it got worst I started to really blame myself and started to close myself off to everyone. One night my good friend came over and we were watching a movie she had no idea what really was happening in my life. I got phone call from a lady and that when I found out that he had been cheating on me for two years. It was like smack in face and I felt like I had strength that hadn't had since I was 17. I asked him and he wouldn't told me to shut up. He try to hit me but I just wouldn't back down. Finally he told me about the others and I couldn't handle it so I left..... i found my strength and kicked him out.
I am almost 23 years old and I was doing amazing on my own I felt I had voice and was strong I was trying repair my life and the sercet of what he did came out. But sadly things have changed five months ago I let him back into my life....
He promise me he changed and in first month he seemed like he changed that he loved me. But I feel like scared girl some nights because he starting to yell again. My family was upset let him back. I love him and I going try stay strong. I told him when he came back if lay one hand on me he would need be worried about my family he will go jail. My father made it clear.
RainbowxXxLove RainbowxXxLove
22-25, F
4 Responses Mar 19, 2016

Being stuck with an abuser is not her fault. Don't listen to any of those who responds with nasty judgmental comments. They have no idea what their talking about. I was in the same situation for 7 years. I left and went back, left and went back and so on... One day I got away and Ive stayed away for good this time. I went to a women's shelter and they gave me the support, the strength and the knowledge about abusive relationships. Unfortunately guys like that are master manipulators and they will say and do anything to get their victims back into their clutches... And from what I was taught in the shelter I was at on average it takes a woman 7 tries to leave an abusive relationship before she leaves for good. For the longest time I thought I was doing something wrong and I was crazy for going back. I never thought I was worth more then that and I'd never find anyone that would love me. But he was wrong for saying those horrible things to me. He was wrong for manipulating me back into the abuse. It is a choice to abuse so it's his fault. -Only his fault. Ever since being out of that horrible relationship I had everything else to gain, I found true love this time and I have a nice life now. Leaving an abusive relationship isn't at all easy. After a while out it still effects me emotionally and Im getting help through counciling. Don't be afraid to talk to someone and ask for help. A friend, family member and there's also a 24/7 hotline to help abused women. 1-877-799-7233. If you plan to call someone for help and make an escape -for safer measures be sure to only do this when you have time alone and know your abuser is going to be away for a little while.

One day (hopefully soon), you will see your worth and find the courage to leave this monster behind in the dust. I'm not sure where you are from and what your living conditions are; but if possible I recommend sending him to jail by calling the police on him when you are emotionally ready to take that step. I don't know you, but I have been through this and you need to understand that no one else's uneducated opinions matter here. You were brave enough to write about this publicly, and that takes a lot of courage! Good for you! Baby steps is the only way to go from here. Remember you can be anyone you want to be, and that includes being a STRONG, independent, confident woman who is more than able to remove this loser from your life. He does not deserve your love. In the meantime, feel free to message me to talk. This goes for anyone else who may be reading this as well. You are not alone! As cheesy as it sounds, we have all got to stick together and support one another..

Abusers always get their way in the end. You will suffer in the end and you had all the support in the world. You shouldn't put your family in that position of needing to save you again they already did that.

I'm upset at u too. good luck

This is not her fault. Something is missing in her life that is drawing her back to this awful man. She may not know that yet, and even if she does- it is very hard to determine what it is and to fill that huge void on her own. You never know what else she may be going through. She needs more supports in her life, not people ignorantly blaming her for something they know nothing about.
I hope maybe you meant something else and wrote it wrong. Given that maybe English isn't your first language? I'm hoping because being "upset" is not helping, you aren't the victim here. Please be kind.

what a long essay. won't read .. I hope she gets wise one day and officially moved on from that punk