Abusive Relationships Suck The Life Out Of You.

I am getting out of mine, away from the 'narcissistic B******* who has many many times over 24 years made my life hell, and is abusive to our children at times also, they are young and don't deserve it. Everyone, well most people think he's such a nice easy going guy. He has the balls to be abusive to females, but in all the 24 looooong years of knowing him, being stuck and trapped with IT, i have NEVER known him to be abusive to a man.

Funny isn't it how they can change when other people are around and come across as the Mr Wonderful, well this ******** has lost all that he should have valued and held dear to him, instead of blaming me for every little thing that he manages to **** up in his life. I finally HATE HATE HATE him.





wishwing wishwing 41-45, F 11 Responses Mar 12, 2010

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Im in an abusive relationship right now as well. In the beginning of the year I asked God to show me the truth about this man. Over the course of 3 days, He did. Now I see everything, its crazy, but enlightening at the same time. Now I am just so incredibly hurt and so very outraged. Anything I ever felt towards this man is gone. I have such intense hatred for him, so very intense, that if he fell down on the floor in front of me complaining of chest pain, I wouldnt want to help him. He always comes of like " Mr Nice Guy" as well. Such Bullshit. To me he is the most incredibly cold, callous and selfish man Ive ever met in my life. And what kills me too is he will never admit to it. Ive tried so many times to get him to see the error of his ways. But Ive given up. As long as Im still living with him, everything and anything will always be my fault. Even if he beats me and I call the police, he lie and tell me Im crazy and it will never happen.

I was in a very dangerous abusive marriage and it took all the strength and guts I had in me to get out of it. He married me for money and sex. Well, when I caught on he became so physically and emotionally abusive and I made a vow to myself I will survive. I still have the scars, always will, yet I had Jesus by my side. Get out of the relationship, no matter what it takes, and you will find happiness one day. Never let anyone disrespect you. It is them who have the problem, the only problem we have is what they planted in our mind. Save yourself.

It is possible for anyone to be abusive. I've met both abusive males and females. The important thing is to remove them from your life and you will be much happier.

Is it possible for a female to be abusive.... I mean it has been 11 years since she has shared sex with me. I suggested we go for a cruise and she suggest that I take her cousin who has been divorced twice. Not allowed to touch... She moved into another bedroom last month in this new house!!! What gives with some people!!!?????

I could not agree with you more, in fact i'd love to be the one to melt down the key!<br />
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I still hold the belief dear to me Karma - what goes around comes around....we live in hope, thanks for sharing your'e story and assume you got away, that way they become someone elses problem!

AHAHAHAHAAH.... and your ex will probably continue to blame you until the end of time. With people like that NOTHING is ever their fault. <br />
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"He has the balls to be abusive to females, but in all the 24 looooong years of knowing him, being stuck and trapped with IT, i have NEVER known him to be abusive to a man."<br />
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I wonder if we went out with the same guy? what a coward eh? can't answer to a guy but will give female abuse, verbal, physical, whatever, at every turn... what a sicKO!!<br />
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guess he knows that if he does that to a guy he won't be able to get away with it easily? what a pu$$y/Predator.

Multiple personality disorder or Narcissistic Personality Disorder in his case, is so evil and you think its you that's going mad, they lead you to believe that. I didn't speak about it with people for years and years, what was really going on, as i felt responsible and embarrassed by it. People think he's such an easy going lovely guy, as he displays the attentive father and husband in public, but in reality behind closed doors, he doesn't care a stuff except about cars money and women........i hope they all ruin him.<br />
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I feel for your brother, as guys don't usually display their feelings, so it must be bad to speak about it bloke to bloke. Just support him as best you can, and if he has reached the point where i'm at, then help him plan his escape.<br />
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Thanks for your comments

You are so sweet, and yes i wrote this on a day when he really got under my skin, most days in fact. I have never known anyone like him. thank you for the hugs.

Is there any possibility he has a twin or is committing polygamy behind your back? <br />
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Without exception, every person who has spent time with him sees him as one of the calmest people they have ever met. To make matters worse, he even makes it a point to act conspicuously affectionate towards me whenever we have guests or go out with my friends, but once we are alone, it's as if a switch goes off. Romeo has been replaced with a man who is so emotionally unavailable that he actually doesn't even bother to make friends. When he began emotionally abusing me two years ago, almost no one believed that he was capable of such cruelty. It is soooo frustrating. <br />
Although it appears that we are we are in different places emotionally speaking, I have been where you are....the good news is that, in this situation, particularly with this type of abuser, anger is one of the strongest perspectives from which you can see the promise and possibility of change. I sincerely encourage you to take full advantage of the empowerment it can offer. It seems you know you need I strongly encourage you to make a change...asap. <br />
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Hold on....Stay Strong...and remember....<br />
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you are not alone....not even close sister!

Sounds like you know exactly what i mean. Behind close doors - reminds me of Peter Andre song !<br />
And yes people like that should come with a government health warning !<br />
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I read something similar on here one day.........and someone with a very wicked sense of humour said people should be tested like litmus paper, good idea, if only......had me laughing in any case!<br />
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Well good luck with yours, and thank you for your'e comment.

This is a shame, as when we first meet, things are so good. But I guess over time, we find out who the real person is.... My ex sounds similar, everyone thought she was wonderful and in someways she was, but behind closed doors - At home, it was different. Why do some people put a different face on for public and are different to the people who should be the most important to them... I guess this is part of their attraction, but they should come with a health warning. I.E. Getting to know this person can be damaging to your health !<br />
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Still we live & learn