My Addicted Husband

My husband has been addicted to oxycotin for a long time, he went to detox and now goes to an n/a meeting every night and outpatient treatment but its very hard in mem I'm supportive but I'm angry that theres no time for me or our marriage, I was sad lonely and angry when he was on drugs now im sad and lonely because he doesn't knowhow to be a good husband and i need some advice on how to continue to be lovingand supportive when I don't have a husband, can anyone help? Thanks
bakergirl76 bakergirl76
36-40
8 Responses Sep 6, 2012

Thank you to both teesa and misery51, I appreciate your kind words, I guess I should feel lucky he's in treatment and going to meetings, I will try and go to meetings with him.I just don't know how to deal wth feeling so lonely then I start feeling angry and i don't have no one to talk to either, none of my friends now his problem and now he doesn't have any friends cuz they were all on pills

My husband has been addicted to painkillers for the past 3 yrs, as far as I know before that it was alcohol. We have been married going on 17 yrs and I also do not feel like I have a husband. I hope &i pray for the day that he will get help and detox! I know its hard but you have 2 let him becoming clean as 1st priority. Its going 2 take time for him 2 do this. Dont let him become discouraged. Maybe ask him if you can come 2 the mtgs with him. Or set up a date night for u both where u can reconnect. Dont give up on him or ur marriage. Do everything u can 2 grow closer 2 him. Like I said b4 I long for that day! I want my husband back so badly!

my husband is addicted also. and wont get help. he says if he could just do what his dr. prescribes he would be all right, but he cant do that its killing our marriage, i cae nt take to anyone excecpt my family because every one we know r on these pills. im the only one who doesnt what to do it. our relationship is null and void. he forgets things and acts stupid,and cant keep a job when he used to be the main surpporter. ive left him once,but came back because of promises we are about to lose everything we worked so hard for ,for the past 20yrs. liiving in misery

I am here for you as well! I am going through a lot of similar issues (see my story). I am happy for you that your husband is going to recovery meetings, mine has yet to really admit he is a true addict, but it IS very hard to feel like you are always the one that gives up what you need to support your spouse.

Thanks for your kind words, it does help knowing I'm not alone. He is doing great in his recovery and I am proud of him, but i don't know how to handle this alone feeling I have all the time. I have no friends or family I can talk to about this because no one knows whatvim dealing with. So thanks for being there for me:-)

Thanks for your kind words, it does help knowing I'm not alone. He is doing great in his recovery and I am proud of him, but i don't know how to handle this alone feeling I have all the time. I have no friends or family I can talk to about this because no one knows whatvim dealing with. So thanks for being there for me:-)

Thanks for your kind words, it does help knowing I'm not alone. He is doing great in his recovery and I am proud of him, but i don't know how to handle this alone feeling I have all the time. I have no friends or family I can talk to about this because no one knows whatvim dealing with. So thanks for being there for me:-)

I'm struggling with the same thing. He keeps saying that I need to be there to support him but what about us? His addiction and recovery come first and foremost in his mind and I'm left wondering where I fit in and where I became so lost. I've been to therapy and was told to remember to make myself happy first. Think about what I need to do in my own life and to not obsess on what he is or isn't doing. I think its very easy to say this if you haven't experienced it first hand. It's my husband, the father of my child.....I wish I could offer some advice but for me, I guess one comforting this about this website is knowing that I'm not alone and not completely crazy for feeling the way I do.