What the ****!
I've just recently found out that my husband of 3 years has been stealing money from my credit card to pay for heroin. I can't tell either of our families or my friends for fear that they will judge him even more than they already do. We are not the type of ppl that would stereotypically fall into this pit. I have no idea what to do.
I can't believe this has happen. I feel completely betrayed. To money stolen and be lied to by someone who loves you and says that their life has been better with you. I can't look at him, I can't hold him, I can't day i love you without cringing. I thought that him being out of work for two years was bad enough. Having to say to him constantly that we need help, I need support, we can't afford to pay rent or bills let alone put food on the table. To find this out was the biggest punch to the guts. And as if the gods didn't have enough fun that day they decided to throw in a $50 parking fine as well.
When it rains it pours...but why did I get the tsunami? I can't breathe. I've been on anti-depressants for almost a year but have just run out of prescriptions...perfect tact! I want to disappear. I want to scream and punch the walls...in fact I did punch a wall the other day and my hand is hurting like shite. I'm completely dehydrated from crying buckets. My skin looks like shite, which doesn't help when you're a makeup artist whose face is on display.
It's nice to read tho that the feelings and emotions I'm expreiencing are, for want of a better word, 'normal'. I'm going to a support meeting for friends/family this week so we'll see where that takes me.