In Desperate Need Of Advice!

I do not have Bdd but my best friend and I are pretty sure she does. We have been best friends since kindergarten and are now roommates in our second year of college. We have been there for each other through everything no matter what, but I'm so scared and concerned for her well being.

She grew up the youngest of five living with her wonderful hard working dad. Her mom (who is diagnosed with bipolar disease), although stayed in touch and hung out once in a while, was never there for her growing up and with a father supporting his 5 children it was impossible for him to be there for her a lot. Her siblings (a couple of them also seem bipolar with depression or something) meant well and didn't mean to hurt her but they tended to tease her when she was growing up because she had a little more chub then other kids.

I see her checking herself in the mirror constantly and she will never go anywhere without doing her hair and makeup. She has a super nice boyfriend but I see her constantly saying hurtful things to him and even punching him in the face at a couple different occasions. Their relationship has gotten so bad. They never go out on dates because she is afraid there will be a pretty waitress or something, they don't go to the mall together because there are pretty girls there, they only watch animated cartoons and movies because seeing pretty girls on tv make her cry and get mad, she can't stand that he has a job, and she has even texted me and told me that we need some time apart because she has had dreams that he has cheated on her with me and the thought of it hurts her even though she tells me she knows I would never do anything like that to her.

I have known this girl pretty much my whole life and I can see that she is so unhappy and this is tearing her up inside. She is always depressed, angry, violent, and/or upset and it's breaking my heart. I see her pushing so many people away. She is losing so many of our friends and she has been getting in more and more fights with her family. She has said so many mean and hurtful things to me when she gets heated up and although they hurt me I have told her that she will never push me away. I can see this taking over her mind and I know the things she says to me isn't coming from her, it's coming from this disorder thats slowly taking my best friend further and further away from me.

This past summer I got the phone call that I never wanted to hear. She overdosed on pain meds and ibprofen and ended up in the hospital. I rushed there and seeing her lying in one of those beds was one of the hardest things to see. I stayed the entire day in the room with her only leaving to go buy her food at subway. I did a good job of keeping it together and told her how much I loved her and that I was always going to be there for her, but I needed her to be there for me for the rest of our lives. It obviously wasn't her time to go thank god but things just seemed to get worse after that.

This christmas break, her and I got together to have some drinks with a couple of our best guy friends we have known since we were little. The night turned into a nightmare and the flip switched on her. She started freaking out saying that we weren't real friends and that we didn't care about her. She told us that a couple of different people were coming to get her but we found out one after another that she was lying and no one was coming. She still wanted to leave but we weren't allowing her because 1-it was like 10 degrees outside 2-she had been drinking enough that it wasn't safe and we were underaged 3-she didn't even have a car there and 4-she lived many miles away from her house. I ended up yelling at her which I never do to anyone and had to call my parents to come get both of us. She refused to sleep anywhere near me and left early the next morning. We ended up talking about it and she apologized for everything she said but she lost those two best guy friends we have been friends with our whole lives, one of them being her own cousin.

Just recently I got a text from her boyfriend and father asking if I knew where she was because she had left hours before and they couldn't find her and were worried since she had a rough morning. I went driving around searching for her and texting her saying I wasn't going to give up and she knew that. I scared her enough to walk back to her house but I didn't trust her to stay at her house because she wasn't going to be watched there. I texted her nicely and asked her to come over like I had earlier that day, before everything and she proceeded to say hurtful things to me and told me to **** off. Well I showed up at her house and got her to calm down and brought her back with me but I know it wont last for long.

I have talked to her about seeing someone and telling them how she feels and how she thinks she has bdd but she is so embarrassed. She has talked about killing herself so many times and I don't know what I can say or do for her to give her that boost of encouragement to go. I know if she doesn't get help I am going to lose my best friend. If any of you have any advice for me please please please please let me know before it's too late. She is so young and absolutely beautiful I just want her to get the help she needs so she can see that and live that amazing life that she deserves.
BrittanyS BrittanyS
Jan 15, 2013