I Want This To Stop

I'm sitting here tonight, after reading several awful things online about BPD.
I had all the motivation for the therapy and for "changing" to be normal.
I've lost my motivation. It's gone. It's just left me, sitting here alone. Motivation for a better future was all I had left. I wish I still had it, it makes life easier when I had the motivation.
I want it to stop. I want a day where I don't feel like i'm going insaine.
I don't want to sit here and cry and cry and cry anymore.
If motivation was a physical thing, I'd get on my knees and beg it to stay.
I don't know where to go from here.
One day at a time I guess.
Raveneyes Raveneyes
18-21, F
1 Response Sep 24, 2012

Motivation comes and goes. It can be hard to find the strength to keep up the battle, but it is worth it. There is a certain peace that comes after exorcising BPD's control. Just picture the future you would like. The first step to achieving it is winning this fight. You will win and have support. :)