I Have Borderline Personality Disorder

Really Bad Day

By: luckypickle

Written on June 22nd, 2009

Today I had to go to the doctor. I have had mild symptoms for a while but since my miscarriage things have gotten worse. I've started cutting worse..closing all the curtains and locking the door...getting mad for no reason...and starving myself. I've lost 10lbs this past week and my parents finally noticed. They gave me two choices..doctor..or hospital. I chose my doctor and he sent me to the mental health clinic for an emergency evaluation. My new therapist and my old shrink talked while I was there and together they thought that BPD wasn't the only thing going on with me. They told me I also have Major Depressive Disorder..I've never heard of it. I didn't know you could have more than one disorder. So now my lorazepam dose has risen and since it's illegal for my pcp to write dangerous scripts I have to wait until I can see the psychologist to get my new meds which I was told will be lithium again...which I guess is okay since they helped before. I'm not complaining or looking for attention...I just needed to get that out.

By: luckypickle

Age: 26-30

2,199 people have read this story

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11 responses

pandora102693

It's always good to gte things out. I know you're just venting, which is fine. It's deffinately a lot more healthy than cutting. You can have more than one disorder,my cousin has several. He has borderline personality disorder, scitzophrenic, and clinically depressed.

Apr 18, 2012
2 likes
- luckypickle
  Fosho.
  Wow :(
  
  Apr 19, 2012
  1 like
- pandora102693
  Yeah :/ ...it's hard on all of us, this summer he had had a total meltdown. Before people use to think that he was just paranoid, but his schitz was barely diagnosed this summer. He was trying to use drugs to pull himself out of his depression but it backfired. For an entire week all he did was use drugs and drink, he also wasn't sleeping, on account of the cocain, so that was the catalyst for his schitz.
  
  Apr 19, 2012
  1 like
PRETTYGIRLHATESTHEWORLD

Hi Lucky pickle:] How did you know you have it??did you have some of the traits listed??

Apr 18, 2012
2 likes
- luckypickle
  I have most of them. A psychiatrist did the diagnoses.
  
  Apr 19, 2012
  1 like
BarvoDelancy

Oof. I can't imagine being in your shoes. You must be one hell of a tough woman to play the cards you've been dealt (to use a crappy metaphor). I hope the new treatment works out and you can get through this rough spell.

Mar 17, 2012
2 likes
- luckypickle
  Thank you.
  
  Mar 17, 2012
  1 like
luckypickle

thank you mentalgent. i will think about what you said. i need to find the answer myself.

Jul 25, 2009
1 like
luckypickle

honestly my friends have helped the most. and they know who they are.

thank you for that dancebear.

Jul 24, 2009
1 like
luckypickle

nice typing and thanks for the comment and pick me up *hug* to michaelojibwa

Jun 26, 2009
1 like
michaelojibwa

i think i have brodelibne personaLITY dIsOrDeR too..just to let you know i can relTE...WITH disorders..and apparently hitting the wrong keys when i type...but..social anxiety...in aa meetings i go ******* crazy just sitting there...the more people..the worse it gets...and depression too..

Jun 26, 2009
1 like

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