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I Have Bulimia

I Hate Knowing What I Put Myself Through :(

By: sarah1996bick
Written on February 2nd, 2012
I am 15 and my name is Sarah. I make myself puke so I can lose weight, so yeah you could say I am bulimic, I don't really call it bulimia I just call it a diet. NO one knows about my secret. I don't want anyone to no my secret, if they no they will tell me to stop or be mad or something at me, then I wouldn't have my way of losing weight. I exercise a lot. I mean I'm not proud of what I do, its just the only way I can lose weight faster and stuff. One day people were talking bout eating disorders so I looked them up. And I found out that I had one... And it was bulimia. I don't believe that I can die from being bulimic. I think its just people trying to scare people who really are so they will stop. Some days I wanna stop puking, and exercising. But if I do I won't lose weight. My life is so centered around me trying to be thin, like girls at my school, and people on T.V, the models. I just want to be thin like them, so people, will like me.... But I struggle through bulimia and I would rather struggle then give up puking. Its not like I do it 4 times a day. I only do it 2 times a day everyday. So its not that bad.... I haven't told anyone about me puking. I will never plan to, if I do they will bring me to the hospital or something, or yell at me. Which its not bad at all. If I eat something big and I don't puke it up I will think about it all day until I do puke it up.
But thanks for listening. It means alot.
By: sarah1996bick
Age: 13-15 , Female
364 people have read this story

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2 responses
  • lizeyyyy
    lizeyyyy

    hi sarah :-)

    i really do remember when i was thinking just like you. as you get older you will regret doing this. this is a way of dealing with your emotions and problems. maby you dont have anyone to talk to or feel understand you and so you just keep doing this. you might think its only to loose weight but its something else also standing behind making you go to the extreme. maby a cry for help? the only thing i know is when i first got bulimia i didnt tell anyone and it was my secret for many years. you should talk to a therapist if you dont want to talk with you family or friends. deal with your problems and feelings now and dont try to push them away because i promise you they will not go away just because you develop an eating dissorder. as long as you are doing this your problems wont be solved. and the day you realise your tired of having an eating dissorder you will find yourself trying to remember why you started in the first place, what made you begin. get the help you need now and dont waste anymore time because problems cant be forgotten with food. send me a mail if u want to talk.. <3

    Feb 11, 2012
    2 likes
    • sarah1996bick
      sarah1996bick

      thanks that really means a lot coming from someone that did/ has that same problem I do. But If I do need to talk I will email you. :)

      Feb 12, 2012
      1 like