Bulimia Battle

Hi all,
This is the first story i have shared on here, so lets get started.

I have bulimia, i have been purging now for over 4 maybe even 5 years, somehow all the years with this monster merge into one big mess.
I remember the first time i ever purged, i had just had my evening meal with my family (unhealthy as always) then we watched a tv show about some super skinny beautiful women and a sudden overwhelming feeling of self disgust washed over me. I went straight to the bathroom and made myself sick, i felt better for having that horrible food out of me. After this i was determined to eat healthily from that point on, and i did ... most of the time and when i didn't, it was easier to make myself vomit than to be worrying all night about what i had eaten, so as the weeks went on purging became my friend.
The months kept passing and i thought i was in control i only purged when i wanted to, not every day just now and then.
Secretly bulimia was was wrapping its controlling grasp around me and before i could take control once more it was too late.
After years of being bullied and controlled by bulimia i have finally took the first steps to try and get help, i went to the doctor and confessed all and i am now in the process of waiting for my treatment to start. I have shared this snippet of my story because i want to speak to others going through recovery or just wanting encouragement to get help too.

Dee.
deeb1989 deeb1989
22-25, F
2 Responses Dec 13, 2012

dee, i am in the same boat. IM me when you can

Wow. At least you see it and are working to win control from it. I'm not sure I even know what really to say, other then Seems like your doing good with it. Stay strong lady!