I Miss The Old Me

Hi, Im 20 years old. I have never struggled with anything like this before. I always used to be a bigger girl, then for about 6 months now Ive become really healthy exercising daily, and eating well. I was strong, motivated, and determined. I lost 49 pounds. So my present to myself was having a normal Christmas with treats. Since then though, I havent been able to get myself back on track. Let alone, I dont even now where this came from, but I started binging until Id make myself sick. I want to stop so badly. Its only been about a month, I say to myself today was the last day. Remember how badly you feel after, then the next day itll happen again, or 2 hours later when I see the bag of chocolate I hid. I hate myself for it, and Im so disapointed in myself, especially after all the hard work I did to get myself to this point already. I dont now what to do, and I dont want people to know. Im scared, because of all those stories Ive looked up. I just want to be myself again.
An Ep User An EP User
Jan 17, 2013