hey all of u ,
u probably remember me , i am 23 yrs old , was bulimic for 4 months , i am in recovery now .
that's my 2 months with out throwing up ,just wanted to share my experience with u , as two months is a milestone ,
i know that recovery is hard , even if it is as an idea , because i got used to bulimia that I couldn't imagine my life with out it .
i couldn't resist the food when it is coming out , it becomes automatic.
so yes i used to think that bulimia is un quitable , bulimic once bulimic always
but u know what i had found out ? bulimia takes over ur life ,it uses ur body to hurt, uses ur brain to think , uses ur time to waste on Binging and Purgingi used to take so much time Binging , throwing up , cleaning throwing up remains, taking laxatives, taking multivitamis , hiding the pale face and dark circles under eyes with makeup , thinking 24 /7 about food .
in recovery i could find that i am more active to do many things (bulimia made me tired all the time)
so i go to the gym 3 times a week (help me loose weight the healthy way and for the depression due to recovery),
i also make charity activities , preparing for master degree ,
all of those i couldn' do because i didn't have time ,because i was throwing up!
recovery makes u think again about ur life not just food , it makes u reorganize u r life ,learn from ur mistakes .
i remember praying to God to quit this disease , wondering i was always good person what wrong did i made to be punished with this ?
but actually i learnt alot from this experience about myself and othres around me .
what i need to tell u that even if recovery is hard , depressing , painfull ,.......it worth it ,
because u worth it u deserve to live better life ,
be a happy person because u are all beautiful inside out
if u want any thing i am here for u :)